TWO MEN (JACK AND DAVE) WITH ENGLAND SHIRTS ON ARE SITTING ON A WALL.
Dave
So, (PAUSES) What we going to be doing this summer? It'll be boring with no hooligan activities.
Jack
Not for me, I'm going to Austria.
Dave
Austria?
Jack
Yeah, for Euro 2008
Dave
But we didn't make it. Remember?
Jack
I know that but our Dad's Austrian, so I'll just support them.
Dave
You can't do that.
Jack
Why not?
Dave
Because I'll be stuck here in the bloody rain while you'll be over there doing a bit of recreational hooliganism.
Jack
That's not my fault though is it?
Dave
I know that, but we've gone everywhere together, we're the blood brothers, internationally feared in every competition, World Cups and European Championships. Remember France 98?
Jack
When we beat the Argentinian's to a pulp with baguettes?
Dave
Yes! With baguettes that WE had stolen! And what about Germany 06?
Jack
(LAUGHS) You mean when we chased Christiano Ronaldo while shouting 'who's a cheating bastard?!'
Dave
(LAUGHS) Yes! Come on, you can't go.
Jack
Why not? (PAUSES) Why don't you come with me?
Dave
I don't know.
Jack
Come on support the Austrians. We'll do them proud.
Dave
OK then, wait a second. (JUMPS OF WALL AND TURNS TO HOUSE) Mum? Do you think Uncle Josef will let me stay in his house with our Jack?
Jack
(LAUGHS)She won't hear you from there?
Dave
Why?
Jack
She's in my cellar.
Dave
Your cellar? I thought we agreed that I'd have her at weekends.
Jack
Yeah sorry.
(DAVE JUMPS BACK ON WALL AND SIGHS)