RUNNING GAG. A LAS VEGAS BOXING MC COMES TO THE UK AND WORKS IN VARIOUS JOBS.
SCENE 1. INT. DAY. LIBRARY.
WOMAN: Could I borrow these two books please?
MC: (very loudly/slowly) Baaaaaaaaaccccccckkkkkkkkk ( PAUSE) iiiinnnnnnnnnnnnnn (PAUSE) ttttwwwwwwwoooooooooooooooo (PAUSE) wwwweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeekkkkkkkkkkkkkkksssssssssssssss.
SCENE 2 . EXT. DAY. FUNERAL. HE IS WORKING AS A VICAR.
(SFX OUTDOOR NOISES/ DIRT BEING THROWN ON COFFIN)
MC: (very loudly/slowly) Aaaaaassssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhhhhheeeeeeeesssssss (PAUSE) tttooooooooooooooooooo (PAUSE) aaaaaaaasssssssssshhhhhhhhheeeeeessssssssss. (PAUSE). Dddduuuuuuuuuuuuusssssssssssssssssttttttttt (PAUSE) tttttooooooooooooooooooooo (PAUSE) dddddduuuuuuussssssssssstttttttttttttttt.
SCENE 3: EXT. DAY. POLICE STAKE-OUT. HE IS WORKING AS A POLICEMAN AND ARRESTS A CRIMINAL AND READS HIM HIS RIGHTS.
MC: (very loudly/slowly) Yyyyyyyyoooooooooooooouuuuuuuuuuuuu (PAUSE) Ddddooooooooooooooooooo (PAUSE) nnnnnnnnnnnnnnoooooooottttttttttt (PAUSE) hhhhhaaaaaaavvvvvvveeeeeeeeee (PAUSE) tttttttttoooooooooooooooooooooo (PAUSE) sssssssssaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy (PAUSE) aaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnyyyyyyyyyttttthhhhhiiiiiinnnngggggggg.
THE CRIMINAL RUNS OFF BEFORE THE MC FINISHES GIVING HIM A CAUTION.
MC: (very loudly/slowly) Oooooooooooooooooopppppppppppppppppssssssssssss.
ENDS.