INT. NIGHT. HOME.
BILL GATES IS TALKING ON THE PHONE TO CEO STEVE BALLMER.
SFX PHONE RINGS
BILL: Hello.
STEVE: Bill, Steve here, I take it you heard Yahoo’s price.
BILL: Yeah, they’re greedy bastards. Did you get anywhere with them?
STEVE: I tried to compromise Bill.
BILL: On what?
STEVE: The software, I offered them Powerpoint News and Dating Works.
BILL: That seems reasonable, what’d they say?
STEVE: They turned it down.
BILL: Greedy bastards.
STEVE: They proposed Yahootlook and Accessenger.
BILL: What damned mumbo jumbo is that?
STEVE: Mumbo jumbo weren’t involved Bill.
BILL: Why, who the hell are they?
STEVE: Dunno, you’d need to go on Wikipedia to find out.
BILL: (confused) What? (PAUSE) What about email?
STEVE: Its like posting a letter but a helluva lot quicker. (SFX SNIGGERS)
BILL: I meant Yahoo mail Balmer, you greedy bastard.
STEVE: Sorry Bill, it wont happen again.
BILL: You’re damned right it wont.
STEVE: You got my word on that Bill, my Microsoft Word. (SFX GIGGLING)
BILL: Cut the crap or I’ll run you out of town like a cheap pygmy. And email, remember?
STEVE: I’ll need to check it, I’ll get back to you on that.
BILL: So where are we now?
STEVE: I’m in a jacuzzi Bill and you?
BILL: (shouting) Where the hell are we as regards negotiations?
STEVE: Yahoo are in talks about merging.
BILL: With whom?
STEVE: Giggle and AWOL. (SFX LAUGHING)
PHONE LINE GOES DEAD.
VOICE: Who was that dear?
BILL: Some greedy bastard.
ENDS.