The below has been inspired by 2 Lollipop men I see every morning. I laugh at them every day. I'm not sure that written down it's as funny as whats in my head.
The Lollipop Men
Scene: There are 2 Lollipop Men stand across from each other on opposite sides of a not very busy road.
2 Lollipop men are stood on opposite sides of the road staring at each other. After a while a child turns into the street and starts walking towards them. The Lollipop men look at the girl, then back at each other. The girl gradually gets closer, the looks start getting quicker, the eyes of the Lollipop Men start to narrow, their grips tighten on their sticks, as the girl reaches the 2 men they sprint into the middle of the road and start hitting each other with their sticks. They end up rolling around in a heap on the floor.
As they are fighting the girl skips past them without giving them a second glance.
Or an alternative ending:
Scene: There are 2 Lollipop Men stand across from each other on opposite sides of a not very busy road.
2 Lollipop men are stood on opposite sides of the road staring at each other. After a while a child turns into the street and starts walking towards them. The Lollipop men look at the girl, then back at each other. The girl gradually gets closer, the looks start getting quicker, the eyes of the Lollipop Men start to narrow, their grips tighten on their sticks, as the girl reaches the 2 men one of the men spins round and hits the girl in the face with his stick, knocking her unconscious to the ground. The men return to staring at each other.