British Comedy Guide

My script for a cartoon

I'm nervous about posting my scripts here for fear of my ideas being stolen Huh?

I wrote this last month and had a guy animating it for me. I was intending on puting it on the internet but now my animator has quit I don't know what to do with it.

It's humor is similar to Family Guy (I watched every episode before writing) and South Park

Please give me your oppions and let me know who you think it would be suitible to submit to.

Like I said I'm nervous soI have only posted the beginning of the script but I think it's enough for you to get the idea.

SCENE 1. EXE. LOCATION: BACKYARD - DAY

MARTIN IS SUNBATHING IN HIS BACKYARD

WILSON(O.O.V):
Hi-di-ho Good neighbor.

MARTIN LOOKS TOWARDS THE FENCE

MARTIN WALKS TOWARDS THE FENCE

MARTIN:
Oh Hi Wilson.

WILSON IS ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE FENCE

ONLY THE TOP HALF OF HIS FACE IS IN VIEW

WILSON:
How are you doing?

MARTIN:
I'm ok.

WILSON NODS

WILSON:
Uh hmm Uh hmmm. Do you have any problems
you want tell me about?

MARTIN:
No thats ok.

WILSON:
Are you sure? You know you can talk to
me about your problems.

MARTIN:
No, I don't want to tell you my
problems.

WILSON:
Please?

MARTIN:
(SNAPS)
NO!

WILSON:
Ahhhh. Why not.

MARTIN:
Because your the biggest gossip in town!
You sell stories to the press.

WILSON:
Come on there must be something in your
life you've not happy with.

MARTIN:
Sorry Wilson.

MARTIN BEGINS TO WALK AWAY

WILSON:
Are you lonely? Do you want a date?

MARTIN TURNS AROUND

MARTIN FROWNS

MARTIN:
With you?

WILSON:
Well I'll try anything once. Or in this
case twice.

WILSON QUICKLY RAISES AND LOWERS HIS EYEBROWS IN A
SUGGESTIVE MANNER

WILSON (CONT):
But I was thinking you might like to
meet my daughter.

MARTIN LOOKS CURIOUS

MARTIN:
Is she a girl??

WILSON:
She is now!

MARTIN FROWNS

WILSON:
Ok, Ok, then how about my niece?

MARTIN LOOKS CURIOUS AGAIN

WILSON:
She's in town for the weekend I'm sure
she'd like to meet you.

MARTIN LOOKS INTERESTED

WILSON:
Would you like to see a picture? Her
names Alice.

WILSON HANDS MARTIN A PICTURE OVER THE FENCE

MARTIN LOOKS AT THE PICTURE

(CLOSE UP OF PICTURE. ALICE IS HOLDING TWO DOGS)

MARTIN BEGINS TO DROOL

MARTIN:
WOW!

WILSON:
She's something isn't she?

MARTIN:
Yeah.

(CLOSE UP OF THE PICTURE AGAIN)

MARTIN:
Ahhhhh. Cute puppies. Are they hers?

WILSON:
Oh yes. I would love to play with those
babies.

MARTIN LOOKS AT WILSON UNSURE OF WHAT HE MEANT

MARTIN:
Okay. Thanks Wilson!

WILSON:
No problem good neighbor.

MARTIN:
Wilson, can I ask you something?

WILSON:
Well sure.

MARTIN:
Why do you always hide your mouth?

WILSON:
I have herpes!

MARTIN LOOKS SHOCKED

MARTIN WALKS AWAY SLOWLY

CUT TO:

SCENE 2. INT. LOCATION: LIVING ROOM.

MARTIN IS GETTING READY FOR HIS ALICE

MARTIN SINGS

MARTIN:
I found my thrill, on Blueberry
Hill.....

LENNY ENTERS

LENNY:
I've solved all your problems boss.

MARTIN:
What are you talking about Lenny?

LENNY:
Wilson told me all about your big date.
So I found someone who can help you.

MARTIN:
(UNDER BREATH)
Stupid Wilson.
(TO LENNY)
I don't need any help.

LENNY:
I think you've gonna want this guys
help.

MARTIN LOOKS CONFUSED

HUGH HEFNER ENTERS

LENNY:
Martin, this is my good friend Hugh
Hefner, Hef this is my boss Martin.

MARTIN LOOKS SURPRISED

HEF SHAKES MARTIN'S HAND

HEF:
Nice to meet you Marty, I've heard a lot
about you.

MARTIN:
Hi Mis..Mister Hefner, (TO LENNY) What's
he doing here?

HEF:
Lenny hangs out at the Playboy Mansion
all the time. He's quite the playa.

LENNY LOOKS EMBARESED

HEF:
When Len told me you needed help with a
date I came over as fast as I could.
(PAUSE)
And I don't usually come fast!
(CHUCKLES)
I jest.

MARTIN:
How are you going to help?

HEF:
Well we'll start off with your clothes,
you don't want to look like a square do
you?

MARTIN:
I...

HEF:
TO THE HEF MOBILE!
CUT TO:

SCENE 3. INT. LOCATION: CLOTHES STORE.
MONTAGE OF MARTIN TRYING ON OUTFITS AND GETTING READY FOR
HIS DATE

SCENE 4. EXE. LOCATION: OUTSIDE THE RESTAURANT. - NIGHT

MARTIN, THE ALIEN, LENNY AND HEF ARE OUTSIDE THE
RESTAURANT

HEF IS DOING LAST MINUTE PREPARATIONS TO GET
MARTIN READY FOR HIS DATE

HEF HANDS MARTIN A SMALL DEVICE

HEF:
Here take this Marty.

MARTIN LOOKS CONFUSED AT THE DEVICE

MARTIN:
What's this?

HEF:
It's a communication device. I'll be
able to talk to you with this
microphone.

MARTIN:
Oh.

MARTIN STARES AT THE DEVICE BEFORE PUTTING IT IN
TO HIS EAR

HEF:
What are you doing Marty?

MARTIN:
Putting it in my ear, so I can hear you.

HEF:
That's not where it goes. It's a
suppository!

MARTIN LOOKS SHOCKED

HEF:
Well, what are you waiting for Marty?
Insert it!

MARTIN LOOKS UNHAPPY

HEF:
STICK IT IN MARTY!

MARTIN, LOOKING UNCOMFORTABLE, STICKS IT UP HIS
ASS

HEF:
Alright.
(PAUSE)
Now. I'm gonna have to hear you too
so........

HEF PULLS OUT ANOTHER DEVICE

HEF:
Help me insert mine.

HEF PULLS DOWN HIS PANTS AND BENDS OVER

MARTIN LOOKS DISGUSTED

MARTIN PROCEEDS TO PLACE THE SUPPOSITORY UP HEF'S
ANUS

THE ALIEN SMILES

HEF STANDS UP AND PULLS HIS PANTS UP

HEF:
Alright now go get her Marty!

MARTIN TURNS AND STRANGELY WALKS TOWARDS THE
RESTAURANT DOORS

it definitely has that south park feel to it. have you tried finding another animator? I know of one, but he's only doing short clips at the mo. I can ask him if you like...!

Sure it would be great to find a new animator.

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