Is this a bit 'lite'?
Int. Living Room
A woman and man are sat on a couch. An adoption agent, with a clipboard, is sat opposite them.
Agent: Nervous?
Man: A little. This is the first time we've adopted.
Agent: Well don't worry, you're getting a lovely little z-list celeb
Woman: He came second in Big Brother, didn't he?
Agent: Yes, but don't mention it. He's still bitter.
Man: Can we see him now?
Agent: (CALLS) Samuel! You can come in.
Samuel pokes his head round the door. He looks gormless and has a ridiculously bleached and trendy mullet.
Man: Hello Samuel!
Samuel ducks back out of the room.
Woman: You're scaring him. (CALLS) Samuel, S - S - S - Samuel!
Samuel nervously enters the room. He's wearing a white T-shirt which carries the text "I'm Crazee!!!" He runs and hides down by Agent.
Woman: Hello Samuel. I'm your new Mummy!
Samuel: Mumma?
Man: And I'm your Daddy.
Samuel: Dadadadada?
Agent: Samuel, haven't you got something to give them?
Samuel: Yesh!
Samuel runs out of the room, like an idiot, and comes back in with a plastic bag. He takes out two books and hands them to the man and woman.
Man: What's this, Samuel?
Samuel: My automyography.
Woman: Thank you, Samuel!
Samuel sits down on the floor. The woman begins to cry.
Man: What's the matter, dear?
Woman: I just can't understand why anyone would give him up.
Samuel starts sniffing his armpit.
Agent: His parents had become... mortally embarrrased.
Man: Samuel, we've got a film premiere lined up for you tonight!
Samuel: Tabloids be there?
Woman: Every single one!
Samuel: Oooh!
The man gets off the couch and starts tickling Samuels chin. Samuel giggles.
Man: I can't believe you only came second.
Samuel starts to look enraged.
Samuel: Second?! SECOND?!
Agent: I told you not to mention it!
Samuel gets up and starts headbutting the wall.
Samuel: SECOND! SECCCCCCCONNNNNDDDDDDD!!!!
Woman: Get the camera!
The man grabs a paparazzi style camera and starts clicking rapidly.
Man: Look, Samuel! A camera!
Samuel stops headbutting the wall and looks round. He sees the camera and starts posing.
Agent: I will have to report this.
Agent writes on her clipboard. The woman slaps the man on the arm and looks disapprovingly at him.
ENDS
