Captain Credit Cruncher

BANK MANAGER ON STAGE

BANK
Now from the banking industry, is our new super hero to tell you how to survive the credit crunch. It's captain Credit Cruncher

CAPTAIN CREDIT CRUNCHER RUNS ON STAGE (MAYBE HE HAS A CAPE)

CAPTAIN
Not got a credit card, every one'll think your Al Quaeda. Not buying a second home is a sign of having a small penis. And saving for a plasma screen, instead of buying it at 50% APR means your gay.

BANK
Thanks captain Credit Cruncher your my hero.

CAPTAIN
Thats ok slimey bank manager. Remember kids make sure your parents don't give into the prudence monster! Give credit to credit!

I like this. I think you could do more with it though. Like what if the spender was a girl? Maybe failure to own a credit card would make her a slut. I liked the prudence monster too. Put him up on stage I say. I'm sure you can think of some choice dialogue to put in its mealy mouth.

May do in the future, this is a last minute for TS so it needs to be very short.

Ultimately I want to do the "Don't be a silly c**t" parrot, its like a goldfish credit card. Except it's a parrot that calls you a silly c**t, on you every time you're about to make a silly purchase.
And shits on you.

I'd have a very stained shirt every time I go to Forbidden Planet.

Ahh, a fellow comic boy. How about that Alan Moore, etc etc.