1
CHARLES IS SHOWING CARLA BRUNI AROUND THE PALACE.
CHARLES
And this is the cupboard mummy keeps the all funny things the darkies give her.
CARLA
There's no one around why don't you show me your crown jewels?
CHARLES
What? Why?
CARLA
Jagger, Donald Trump, Sarkozy, I can't resist funny looking rich men.
CHARLES
Mummy, Camila, Mummy Camila save me!
2
SIR ALAN SUGAR IS WALKING ACROSS THE STAGE
ALAN
Right which apprentice, am I going to pick this year to help flog my crappy e-mail phones that don't work.
CARLA APPEARS AND GRABS HIM FROM BEHIND
CARLA
Come here, you nooky bear faced, funny looking millionaire!
3
GEORGE BUSH IS ON STAGE
GEORGE
George, your the millionaire president of the US. You're a big boy, you can remember pants, down, then on the crapper you sit down. Even if I do look funny.
CARLA COMES ON AND LOOKS AT HIM
CARLA
Even I've got standards.
SHE WALKS OFF
