Writing the Second Episode - Description Query Page 2

You can get the Scrubs & Arrested Development pilot scripts on dialyscript.com along with many other scripts, sitcom, movie & drama.

Quote: billwill @ March 20, 2008, 8:27 PM

People around here need to READ more scripts, to SEE what successful writers do.

It's quite hard to actually find full scripts on the internet as it seems most authors want to publish them as books for sale.

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I try to read as many scripts as I can, but as you mention it is difficult to find full scripts on the internet esp of UK sitcoms. A lot of what I do find are transcripts and although I'm sure the fan who has produced them has most of the dialogue spot on, the formatting side of things is not always the same.

Even when you do find actual sitcom scripts it is invariably just the one script. For example BBC's writers room- They have a few sitcom scripts but not examples of Episode 1 followed by 2, 3 or 4 so that you can see how the writer has treated the characters and locations after the initial setting.

You need to remember that a first submission script, even if it is a second or third episode of a sitcom is not necessarily the same text as you would supply for that episode once the sitcom is in production, particularly in the stage descriptions.

The person reading it is only attempting to see if you can write sitcom material. As such you have to write it as if this is the first knowledge they have of your sitcom.

You can of course include a 'treatment' which is the trade jargon for a short summary (in your best English) of the sitcom and the episode, in which you could briefly describe the characters.

In any case you should probably include very brief descriptions of characters as usual in the stage directions, the first time the character appears in the episode. Don't try to do the directors job, only describe what is essential to the plot of the episode or the long-term plot/theme of the whole sitcom.

See this example.. Admittedly it is a drama rather than a sitcom, but it was the only piece I could find quickly. See how Marks & Gran give a really terse description of the policemam and later of MARCIA.

EXT. RIVER LEA TOWPATH. 11AM.
The tow-path is now bustling. A screen deters nosy
locals. The body lies on the tow-path unwrapped. It is
the body of a middle aged Chassidic man, dressed
traditionally. He was GERSHON KLEIN. DET. SGT. PAUL
IBBOTSEN, late thirties, black, watches as a DOCTOR
examines the body. P.C. VERNON is talking to some SCOUTS
on board the barge. A heavy duty pick up truck is
dragging a tatty Volvo out of the river. As it comes out
IBBOTSEN sees a Swastika sprayed on the bonnet.

IBBOTSEN
Oh great, that's all we need!

~~~~

EXT. ANOTHER HOUSE IN THE KLEINS STREET. 9.40AM.
D.S.IBBOTSEN is on the doorstep. The front door is open
and he is showing a photograph of GERSHON KLEIN to
MARCIA, a middle class black housewife.

MARCIA
I hate to say it, but they all look
alike to me.

~~~~

INT. KLEIN'S POULTERERS. 9.45AM.
IBBOTSEN is talking to MOISHE, a downtrodden middle aged
Chassid in a pink smeared apron. MOISHE looks as if he's
still shaken by GERSHON'S death.

MOISHE
No, he just left as usual Thursday
night, said he'd see me in a week.

For the rest of the script see: http://www.datahighways.net/dhl/downloads/w2000/WallOfSilence3_Submission.pdf

Thanks for that information bill. A light bulb suddenly went on after reading your first paragraph.

Def.