Chipshop

INT Chipshop.

The environment is extremely clean. Everything is white and clinical. The ‘fryer’ is wearing a white coat and glasses (few pens in top pocket etc).

Customer:Portion of chips please.

Fryer: Yeah; fill in the CCF

Customer: CCF?

Fryer: Carbohydrate Consent Form; new regulations mate

Customer:What?

Fryer:A simple medical form , let’s the government monitor your carb intake.

Customer:You mean if I go over a limit you won’t sell me any chips?

Assistant:Precisely, but don’t worry; there’s a loophole.

Camera pulls back to see a group of people on exercise bikes, they each have a “Calorie Countdown” screen.

Fryer:Come along Mr Lewis; put your back into it, your burgers almost ready.

I quite like this, it's pretty good.

Could some great big bloke come in with a famine victim, and off set his carbohydrates?

Yeah, Carbohydrate Offsetting I'll try that down the pub tonight!

Like the sketch and my immeadiate thought was Carb Offsetting with a skinny fella as the punchline...

kjs

Yeh but I got there first huzzah!

n.b. did a similar skit on off setting that TS used

Carbon Offset

Wife
You’re home late from the pub, and you haven’t eaten your dinner.

Husband
That’s alright I offset dinner.

Wife
Offset?

Husband
Like carbon offsetting, I pay £5 and a Bangladeshi farmer,
Comes home on time, and eats his crappy, burnt dinner, now how about some how’s your father

Wife
No dear, I’ve off set our sex life, right now a Cambodian woman is having rubbish sex with her pissed husband so I don’t have to.

I like this one.

That's funny.

Is it just me thinking it's bad manners to post another sketch in someone else's thread?

If we're talking with the original poster about what did / didn't work or even if we suggest an alternative (as long as the original poster is fine with that) I can't see an issue but there is a definite trend to either rewrite the original sketch or just hijack the thread with new ideas, which distracts from the original posters objective of gathering crit for his / her work, not some subsequent poster's effort.

I'd personally prefer people open a new thread if they're going to post a sketch, even if it owes a debt to the original. Just paste in a link to the original if needed.

I liked the original btw.

Don't mean to sound harsh, too. And I apologise SootyJ for it being this thread I posted in. It wasn't intended as a personal comment, it was just the first one I came across tonight. Your work is always good ... and prodigious.

I appologise, and will mind my netiquette.

Liked this sketch Writer2K.

Also agree with SlaggA. Posting another piece in someone's thread is very irritating and buggers up the flow of comments on the original piece.

Tidy sketch as they say in South Wales. I'll spank Sooty's bottom for him although he will like that.

Good sketch, Roscoff you seem to be taking an unseemly interest in you. Don't get your fur matted.

Besides haven't you seen my avatar, I'm a giant brain in a jar. I have long since evolved beyond the need of your primitive human bottoms.