INT
Two Old ladies in a fancy, tea room,.
ELSA
My Harold has finally painted the bedroom ceiling. Lazy bastard.
MAUVE
Well he is limbless. However did he manage?
ELSA
I got him one of those extendable rollers. He just sat in his chair, whizzing up & down, painting away with his teeth. My ceiling dazzles. He craned his neck though. Silly bugger, painting walls with his paralysis.
MAUVE
(Tsk) They never listen. Well my Arnold finally got around to mowing the lawn. Lazy Arsehole.
ELSA
Well he is suffering from cancer. However did he manage?
MAUVE
Oh I just dragged him out of bed in his PJ’s & stood him up by the mower, switched it on, & hung his drip off it. He ran like the wind to keep up. My lawn is blooming. Silly Twat, gardening with his terminal illness.
ELSA
Men! They never listen. If my Harold had listened to me. He would still have his limbs. I told him that car needed cleaning. If he had cleaned that car when I said, that on coming truck would have seen that shine a mile off..
MAUVE
I agree. If my Arnold had listened to me, he would never have had his cancer. I told him our front door needed heightening.. If he had done it, then he could have fit that large lump on his head, through it. Got himself diagnosed earlier.
ELSA & MAUVE SHAKE THEIR HEADS IN DESPERATION.
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