Hello again BSGers. I haven't been about for a few weeks and I've been getting confused a bit with modern life.
I took the kids and wife up to London to see that Kismet show but talk about a disappointment. He wasn't even in it. Neither was Miss Piggy come to think of it. So 200 quid down the drain that was. The kids were very upset after I’d got their hopes so high.
That Heather Mills, what about her? She's cracking on that she's a vegan. I bet she has never even seen Star Trek and have you seen her ears? No point...cos she's not a vegan that's why...they're just normal.
What about that thing they said where only kids under twenty could hear that mosquito thing? I've just come back from Africa and I could hear loads of the bloody things. I always thought I was 40 but now I'm confused. How could you lie to me mum?
And talking about hi-tech. What about the new road camera thing that detects blood? We're all fu**ed if the tax man gets hold of that.
And what was all that nonsense in American elections the other week? You were stuck if you didn't like soup weren't you? Why can't they have pancake Tuesday like we do here?
Then the research that said that the increase in gout in Britain was down to too many sugary drinks made me wonder...what's tiling down to?
I went to see that new Johnny Depp movie, Sweeney. But why did they bother to do a remake? The old one was so much better, 'specially when Regan would say "put 'em away darling he's nicked!" and "we're the Sweeney son and we haven't had our dinner!"
Right I've gotta go. You've been Bill Gravy I've been a great audience.
No hang on! You’ve been a great audience and I’ve been Bill Gravy…Sorry I’m confused.