4 skits on Abu Hamza

Abu Hamza 1 23 11 2007

Abu Hamza is talking to a woman in his cell

Woman
I’m from the US embassy, now you’re getting deported Mr Hamza I’m here to ensure you receiveswift and fair US justice.

Abu
Are you a lawyer infidel whore?

Woman
No I’m an undertaker

She gets a tape measure and starts to measure him.

Abu Hamza 2

Prison warder is reading the Sun to Abu

Prison
According to George Bush you’re the Sid Vicious of fundamentalist Islam mr Hamza.

AbuDoes he acknowledge I am the popular, charismatic leader of a revolution?

Prison
No once he gets you over there, you’re going to die on your back, with a needle in your arm.
Abu Hamza 3

Prison warder is talking to Abu Hamza

Prison
You’re being deported to the US because you keep giving people so much shit.

Abu
Gordon Brown

Prison
No the prisoner who has to wipe your arse for you

Abu Hamza 4

Abu Hamza is talking to his lawyer.

Lawyer
Mr Hamza in 2 weeks you’ll be deported to the US where you will 6 months in a coffin sized cell, lights never turned off, no human contact and then they’ll execute you.

Abu
Worthless infidel, is there no way out.

Lawyer
If you agree to be the new England manager there’s a full pardon in it for you.

Abu
Stuff that, in US they only torture me for 6 months, before they kill me.

Like the last one.

Interesting I always liked the 2nd one best.

I didn't like the third one, but the rest were brilliant!
Looks like someone's finding his mojo again

Thanks I write like baboons mate, brief periods of furious violent activity with much hooting.

You don't have the red arse from sitting at the computer too long do you?

No but I do wave it out the window at the yummy mummies, at the posh school nearby.

I'm with Ian: 3 was weak but 1,2 and 4 were crackers.

3 is in the dustbin of history.

1 was fun