DO ME A FAVOR BORIS SPENCER
DAVID CAMERON IS ON STAGE, BORIS JOHNSON COMES ON HE HAS A BANDAGED HEAD.
BORIS
David, some blighter cut the brakes on my bike, and I think it’s the
same blighter, who went through my kitchen writing, put on head, on all my carrier bags.
DAVID
Oh dear, sorry old bean, here have a nice cup of tea, it’ll settle your nerves.
DAVID PASSES BORIS A MUG, TAKES ONE SIP, AND SPITS IT OUT.
BORIS
Bloody hell Dave that’s neat bleach, it’s you, why are you trying to kill me?
DAVID
I was watching the Diana inquest on news. One tragic death, and a mentally unstable, sex maniac, with nice blond hair, is a national hero. Lets face it it’s you’re never going to beat Ken. If you kill yourself, there’s a nice cabinet post in it for you.
BORIS
Chocks away!
BORIS PULLS OUT A GUN, AND SHOOTS HIMSELF IN THE HEAD, HE’S STILL ALIVE,
DAVID
Aim for the brain dunder head.
BORIS POINTS THE GUN AT HIS BUM.
