Fun Obituary Bernard Mathews
News Reader Tragically
3,700 children have been killed in the UK, after a Chinese distributor
accidentally mixed up a delivery of toys, and anti personnel made to look like
toys. Our hearts go out, to all those
horribly killed, or terribly mutilated, by these fun yet deadly weapons.
On a lighter note, Bernard Mathews died today.
After losing a fortune due to bird flu, he threw him self into the
Turkey Twizzler machine. Factory workers
described Bernard as a beautiful person, really beautiful.
Fun obituary Barry Scott
News reader
And that was the tragic news of 300 tourists killed in the escaped maddened Baboon massacre at London Zoo. Our hearts go
out to the friends and families of all those horribly killed, and viciously
mutilated.
On a lighter note, Barry Scott the actor from the Cillitt Bang adverts, whose
cheeky catchphrase was bang and the stain is gone, died today. Barry ignoring advice was filming a new advert in Basra.
He unwittingly stood next to a 500lb road side bomb, Bang and Barry was gone.