British Comedy Guide

Little Things That Make You Smile Page 35

I was a runner until I went knee on knee with a guy while playing soccer this year.
Now I can't run for more than 15 minutes without it feeling like someone is taking a pick ax to my kneecap.
I'm going for physiotherapy but so far it's just stoped the pain from walking. I want to run damn it!

Quote: Curt @ October 14 2009, 1:34 AM BST

I want to run damn it!

Awww... just like Forrest Gump. :)

"Run, Curt, run!"

Quote: Tim Walker @ October 14 2009, 1:29 AM BST

I doubt it would cost much for your family doc to run this test, for some peace of mind. But what do I know, being in the UK? It's just a few leads on your chest, a portable recorder and getting a specialist to interpret the printout.) :)

I have excellent insurance; I doubt it'd cost me more than $30-50 out of pocket. I'm more worried about having to explain this:

Doc: "Look at that rapid heartbeat at 11:30! Your heart was almost red-lined!"

Me: "I was, uh, looking at a video I downloaded." Whistling nnocently

:D (Just be "creative" in the diary you have to keep to go with the test. Say you were "working out" - technically not a lie really. ;))

Quote: Tim Walker @ October 14 2009, 1:46 AM BST

:D (Just be "creative" in the diary you have to keep to go with the test. Say you were "working out" - technically not a lie really. ;))

One look at the difference in size between my right and left arms and he'll see right through the ruse.

I don't run. I do in my knees enough with cycling, tae bo, yoga, and dancey prancing. They will rebel.

Quote: RubyMae - Glamourous Snowdrop at Large @ October 14 2009, 1:55 AM BST

dancey prancing.

:D

Is that along the same lines as foxy-boxing?

Quote: Tim Walker @ October 14 2009, 2:01 AM BST

:D

Is that along the same lines as foxy-boxing?

Yes but with feeling....

Quote: Tim Walker @ October 14 2009, 2:01 AM BST

:D

Is that along the same lines as foxy-boxing?

That's animal cruelty Angry

Quote: Little Jersey Devil @ October 14 2009, 2:09 AM BST

That's animal cruelty Angry

What? Spanking the Monkey whilst watching it? Whistling nnocently

Quote: RubyMae - Glamourous Snowdrop at Large @ October 14 2009, 2:05 AM BST

Yes but with feeling....

I can't dance with any degree of dignity. :(

I'm waiting until I'm officially old and grey enough to do ballroom dancing without being labelled as a gaylord.

Quote: Tim Walker @ October 14 2009, 2:10 AM BST

What? Spanking the Monkey whilst watching it? Whistling nnocently

Not touching that...

In other news I just made a great vegetarian stir fry.

Quote: Little Jersey Devil @ October 14 2009, 2:12 AM BST

Not touching that...

Out of friendship, I won't touch that either. ;)

(Even though I'm supposed to be helping fill-in for Leevil on the innuendo front, whilst he's on holiday.)

Quote: Tim Walker @ October 14 2009, 2:12 AM BST

I can't dance with any degree of dignity. :(

I'm waiting until I'm officially old and grey enough to do ballroom dancing without being labelled as a gaylord.

Why a gaylord? British insults have a class system?

Quote: Little Jersey Devil @ October 14 2009, 2:15 AM BST

Why a gaylord? British insults have a class system?

Indeed.

Gaylords.
Queens.
Lady Rugmunchers.
Tranny Barons.

Quote: Tim Walker @ October 14 2009, 2:18 AM BST

Indeed.

Gaylords.
Queens.
Lady Rugmunchers.
Tranny Barons.

Do I bow or curtsy? I want to observe proper etiquette.

I have to put the rest of that stir fry away. I was just up picking at it. Need to lose 5 pounds.

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