Yoghurt factory

SET IN A YOGHURT FACTORY IN LANCASHIRE IN THE 1940's. MARY IS THE TOILET CLEANER, AND JOHAN IS A COUNCIL FECAL UNIT INSPECTOR. THIS IS A RADIO SKETCH.

MARY:
These toilets are so messy. I don't know what to do.
JOHAN:
Back in my home country, we'd use a special stick.
MARY:
Oh Fancy!!
JOHAN:
Not really, it used to get covered in shit. Sometimes so much we couldn't wash our hair.
MARY:
You know Johan. People's poo says a lot about them.
JOHAN:
Yes I know. Back in my country we had one that wrote for our national newspaper. It was very good.
MARY:
I find that being a toilet cleaner hepls me cope with my Husband Bill. He has gout and a wheezy chest.
JOHAN:
I'm not one for wheezy chests. I once made that mistake and cemented my nipples to the cistern.
MARY:
Are you a relative of that free thinker that was put under house arrest back in your country?
JOHAN:
No that was my younger brother Johan. He died before I was even born.
MARY:
I was very impressed by his paper on the movement of the masses throughout central Europe between the wars. Some saw him as a danger to the authorities though. Didn't they?
JOHAN
No that was just because he held the shit stick.

Good little sketch there.

Hi Rob

I wasn’t too sure what to make of this. At first I thought “is he having a laugh?” but having read it a couple of times I think it’s bloody good.

The humour is in the pathos of the situation. Two people trapped in a prison of cruel circumstances; a bit like Harold and Albert Steptoe.

This shows that if the character dynamics are correct then the comedy follows on nicely. OK so it’s not bust yer gut laughing stuff but it’s subtle and very charming in a sort of Ted and Ralph way.

IMO you should develop these characters into something.

More please.

Thanks for that, I didn't really think anyone would really catch on, especially with the double meanings and a rhythmic rather than linguistic context. To be honest I normally try to keep my sketches fairly lo-brow due to the readership of these forums.

Hey Rob

You'd be surprised about us on here we're a pretty interlek indalk smart bunch.

I got it as soon as I saw it! To me it had undertones of Chekov and no small amount of Uhuru mixed in too.