A CHARLES. E. LAWLEY SKETCH
The Most Disturbing Sketch Ever
Written by
Charles E. Lawley
SCENE 1. INTRODUCTION CARD
VIVALDI’S “FOUR SEASONS” PLAYS AS WE ARE MET WITH A BLACK SCREEN.
THEN IN WHITE CALLIGRAPHIC WRITING WE SEE THE WRITING “THE MOST DISTURBING SKETCH EVER BY CHARLES. E. LAWLEY”. THERE IS ALSO A MODEST, WHITE FLORAL BORDER AROUND THE WRITING
AS THE SCENE FADES TO BLACK VIVALDI’S “FOUR SEASONS” FADES TO SILENCE.
CUT TO:
SCENE 2. INT. SANTA’S GROTO - NIGHT
SANTA IS SAT ON A CHAIR, HE HAS A BLACK SCREEN BEHIND HIM AND A BOOK ON HIS LAP.
SANTA:
Hello Children, let me tell you story about the magic of Christmas.
SANTA PUTS HIS READING GLASSES ON, SANTA OPENS HIS BOOKS AND STARTS TO READ.
SANTA:
‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house, not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.
THE CAMERA ZOOMS INTO SANTA’S FACE.
SANTA:
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care, in the hope that St. Nicholas soon would be there.
SANTA TAKES A PAUSE FROM READING AND SMILES AT THE CAMERA. HE TURNS THE PAGE. HE KEEPS READING. THE CAMERA ZOOMS IN A BIT MORE SLIGHTLY.
SANTA:
The children were nestled all snug in their beds, while visions of sugar plums danced in their heads.
AT WHICH POINT THE CAMERA ZOOMS RIGHT BACK OUT.
WE SEE A MAN BEHIND HIM, HE QUICKLY HITS SANTA OVER THE BACK OVER THE HEAD WITH AN IRON BAR. IT MAKES A SICKENING, HOLLOW THUD. SANTA SLUMPS FORWARD TO THE FLOOR.
MAN:
SHUT UP, FATTY!!!
THE MAN DROPS THE IRON BAR ON THE FLOOR AND WALKS OFF.
END OF SKETCH
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