British Comedy Guide

Add the punch-line. Page 2

MAN:
I was gonna buy some new glasses but I thought I'd get a motorbike instead

Quote: Rob B @ January 14, 2008, 3:34 PM

Hmmm, oh I won did I. Not really my sort of joke thing, but hey ho

MAN RIDES INTO A SHOP ON HORSEBACK

SHOPKEEPER:
Why the long penis?

CHECK-OUT GIRL:
I never thought they'd start holding the Grand National in Tesco's.

CHECK OUT GIRL POINTS TO A SIGN.

GIRL: Can't you read? No animals allowed.

HORSE: Sorry! I'll take him outside at once.

HORSE: Have you got these in a seven and a half?

MAN RIDES OUT OF SHOP ON A PRAWN.

PAN UP TO SHOP SIGN WHICH READS 'PRAWN SHOP'

SHOPKEEP
Get off of yer hoss and drink yer milk

HORSE PROCEEDS TO SMASH UP ALL THE CHINA IN THE SHOP.

MAN: (TO SHOPKEEPER) It's not just Bull's that dislike fine porcelain.

MAN
Blacksmiths?

SHOPKEEPER
No, WH Smiths.

MAN: "Is this the French butchers?"

I'm going to have to vote for Mr Nigel Kelly. Sorry that the setup was so bad.

Your turn Mr Kelly

Oh shit! Cant think of much but:

A COAL MINER WALKS INTO A WHOREHOUSE

MINER:
Heard I can find some good coke in here

"Hey, I hear there's a one-legged gold digger by the name of Heather that hangs out here"

Fancy a tour of my shaft?

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