Golden Years Sketch

This is a radio style sketch that I may be using in a project. It is very foul, so be careful if you're delicate! As I said, its an Audio only sketch.

Interviewer: Welcome to Golden Years. The programme which celebrates the lives of the elderly. This week, our guest, is Mr Arthur Powell. Good evening Mr Powell.

Arthur: Good evening, my boy.

Interviewer: Now, Mr Powell, you are exactly how old?

Arthur: 102 years old?

Interviewer: Wowee! That deserves a round of applause.

SOUND FX APPLAUSE

Interviewer: 102 years old that's quite amazing. In that time, you must have been through a lot.

Arthur: A lot? A lot of what? C**t?

Interviewer: Ha ha ha! Lovely sense of humour there! Now, You're 102 years old, but I believe your memory is still exceptionally sharp.

Arthur: Yes, it is. For example, I can still recall the first girl that I ever...that I ever....

Interviewer: Kissed?

Arthur: No.

Interviewer: F**ked?

Arthur: No. Fingered.

Interviewer: Amazing. Can you recall anything else?

Arthur: Yes, I caught a yeast infection off the bitch. (BEAT) Mind you, she did dance a mean Charleston.

Interviewer: Well there we have it - Mr Arthur Powell. What an amazing life he has lived. It's just a shame that he keeps pissing himself.

SOUND FX MAN PISSING.

Arthur: (WEAKLY) Help me.

I laughed at that

Using words like C**t and fingered to get a laugh and an old man pissing himself as the punchline is pretty crass and not very funny to my mind. Although in your sketch the word c**t would probably get a laugh due to your clever structuring of the dialogue up to that point. Not a patch on your other stuff geezer in my humble opinion!

Thinx: old people pissing themselves is a worn out stereotype, how about turning it on it's head and having the old guy sniffing and smelling urine and the interviewer pissing himself?

Just a thought...

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Arthur: Yes, I caught a yeast infection off the bitch. (BEAT) Mind you, she did dance a mean Charleston.

Interviewer: Well there we have it - Mr Arthur Powell. What an amazing life he has lived and..

SOUND FX MAN SNIFFING

Arthur: What is that smell? Bloody hell you're pissing yourself son..

SOUND FX MAN PISSING.

Interviewer: (WEAKLY) Help me.

Arthur: Not bloody likely, ask your bitch!

I liked it, love the last line, I can really 'hear' it.

Think i'd have to agree with the rage, a better twist, i would say.

Hmm... there seems to be a preponderance of geriatric scatalogy in the critique forum at the moment. Bit tiresome, really. Yeah, do it, but it really does need a twist, or something to lift it beyond the 'easy'. Having said that, the dialogue worked. But you can flex your comedy muscles to better effect, I reckon.

I admit that is completely crass, but I did snigger as I was writing it! I'll have another think about the ending.

Maybe the old guy does piss himself but perhaps he could do it in an unexpected way with similarly unexpected consequences?

Just another random thought!

I didn't find it funny because it wasn't shocking to me and I was expecting a joke that never came. And, as I keep telling my girlfriend, when something doesn't come its very dissappointing

Quote: James Williams @ January 9, 2008, 10:59 PM

Hmm... there seems to be a preponderance of geriatric scatalogy

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My brain nearly exploded reading that

Quote: ajp29 @ January 10, 2008, 12:10 AM

My brain nearly exploded reading that

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Unfortunately, in all my pomp I misspelt 'scatology.'

I am now in the shed giving myself 40 lashes.

Quote: James Williams @ January 10, 2008, 12:14 AM

I am now in the shed giving myself 40 lashes.

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if you're videoing that we're talking big money!