Anyone PINEing for another?
RELIEF Page 2
I don't cedar point, really.
That old chestnut!
etc etc
Quote: Ray Dawson @ November 27, 2007, 9:41 PMA YOUNG MAN IS SEEN URINATING AGAINST A TREE, A LOCAL RESIDENT IS NOT BEST PLEASED AND SO HAS A WORD.
RESIDENT: Oi! Oi! What d'you think you're doing?
YOUTH: I was busting mister.
RESIDENT: That tree's a hundred and fifty years old.
YOUTH: Wow! is that why it's all wrinkly?
RESIDENT: All trees are, didn't you learn that at school?
YOUTH: Nah...couldn't be arsed with school.
RESIDENT: And trees hate spotty little Herberts like you pissing on 'em.
YOUTH: I won't do it again, honest.
RESIDENT: Well that's alright then.
YOUTH: What kind of tree is it mister?
RESIDENT: It's an Elder...you should learn to respect your Elders.
It's better with more condensed dialogue...as above.. 
Condensed maybe but I don't think that one quite works though.
It's the same sketch just superfluous words cut. It's slicker now IMO 
I'm just not entirely sure that it works... would the kid ask what kind of tree it is? Why would he give a f**k? Seems more like a joke to me than a sketch. My favourite bit was : "And trees hate spotty little Herberts like you pissing on 'em."
Spotty little Herberts!
I know it's purposefully corny, but I was expecting a better punchline from the build up and strong comic setting.
Maybe the resident should say what kind of tree it is, not the kid
KID
I won't do it again.
RESIDENT
Make sure you don't. It's an Elder tree and you should respect your elders...
END
Quote: James Williams @ December 2, 2007, 11:47 PMI don't cedar point, really.
OAKy cOAKy