British Comedy Guide

The Commissioners

The slick commissioners sit around a table.

Commissioner 1
So, shoot, what have we got?

Commissioner 2
Scattershot – it's a social satire and urban thriller; cutting edge drama and contemporary comedy.

Commissioner 3
Let's make it motion capture animation – think of how well Beowulf and 300 did.

Commissioner 1
Good idea! We'll get Angelina Jolie in, she's flying high at the moment.

Commissioner 2
Oh come on, it's a gritty film not glamorous. Besides, she isn't going to do the drug or sex scenes.

Commissioner 3
Well, if it's mainly animation then we'll just use an animated Angelina instead of the real thing.

Commissioner 1
Excellent, we'll hire a voice artist and credit it to Angelina Jolly.

Commissioner
Perfect!

Commissioner 2
But if we don't use motion capture actors then it's just an animation. This is supposed to be..

Commissioner 1
Well then, if we're decided on animation we'll bring in Ben Stiller and make a film about penguins. Next!

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