British Comedy Guide

A romcom

Eking
Episode one:
Whirlwinds
By
Teddy Paddalack

SCENE: INT VAN - DAWN:
Eddy King a middle- age man is sat in a van texting the words 'OUTSIDE'

SCENE: EXT VAN- DAWN
The van is a burger type that has the legend 'Eddy's Hot Food' along the side. A woman then comes up and opens the van door to enter it

SCENE: INT VAN: DAWN:
As the woman climbs into the van Eddy a middle aged Scouser looks slightly crestfallen.

EDDY
Are you Terri?

Terrie is a new aged type in her mid-30's with a warm approach and a lot of beads around her neck. Her face drops as she sees Eddy's look of concern.

TERRIE
Don't tell me you thought I was a man? Didn't my cousin Claire tell you?

EDDY
Yes, she just didn't tell me that you
were... well you know?

Terrie is unsure and uneasy about Eddy's point

TERRIE
No, I don't know,

Eddy is wrangling with himself and them comes out with it. And he seems ashamed when he does.

EDDY
A hippy!

TERRIE
Oh, the beads I went back packing for a few
years, and I've just sort of kept them as a
memento

Eddy starts up the van and they converse on the move as they do so Eddy airs his concerns.

EDDY
So, you're not vegetarian or anything stup...
I mean you're ok with and meat and gluten and all the cra.. stuff?

TERRI
I'm fine with it, why what's wrong with vegetarians?

EDDY
Nothing unless you've just sunk every last
penny you had into 10 pounds of bacon 200
pork sausages and six boxes of hamburgers

TERRI
Oh, I see what you were worried about, no, no,
I'm fine with all that. And whatever I'm doing
I catch on quick, so long as the prices are
clearly marked, I'm good to go!

EDDY
Ok well I'll do the traders first, they're as
dodgy as you can get so it's a good way to watch and learn.
When they slack off you can take over. Did Claire tell you the hours and all that?

TERRIE
All I heard was 60 quid cash in hand for a day's work, I stopped listening after that.
You tend to do that when you're skint

EDDY
hooks thumb
Tell me about, barring my float that lot back there is all I have in the world at the moment

Terri looks at Eddy with a slight concern

SCENE: BOOT SALE ENTRANCE- DAWN:

A basic gap in a hedge with a gate and a sign reading Cars £10 Vans £30 Traders £100
A man in a hi viz jacket carrying a bucket walks over to Eddy's van and Eddy's window winds down

SCENE INT VAN -DAWN
Eddy is holding a conversation through the van window with the man in a hi viz vest wellies and a clipboard.

EDDY
Where's Wendy?

MAN
No idea who she is mate? I only started
today. Right so that'll be a £100 and you
can have pitch six by the toilets

EDDY
What it is mate is that I normally pay after I've traded for an hour or so,
that's why I asked where Wendy was? I've been doing it like that for years

MAN
I don't doubt it, but not today, so either pay or do a U turn
please so that I can keep the line moving

Eddy is clearly concerned and grabs 8 plastic bank bags off the dashboard

EDDY
Look here's eighty quid it's my entire float that means I'll have no change. But once I'm in and set up
I'll have the other twenty for you in half an hour

MAN
disinterest
Look mate I not taking part payments so can you turn around and go back out please
you're holding the line up!

Terri rummages in her bag and finds her purse, goes to the back of it and behind a photo of a woman.
She takes out a £20 note that has been folded 4 times. She straightens it out and gives it to the watching Eddy
Eddy immediately realises the implications that this is this woman's last reserve, he holds up his hands as he speaks.

EDDY
Oh no I couldn't, you've come to make money
not risk it

TERRI
Smiles
Why don't you think you can make it back

EDDY
Bravado
Who me? I can make money out of thin air if
I get the chance to

Eddy takes the note and gives that and the eight bank bags of change to the man and they drive into the car boot sale.
As the van drives slowly in there is a group of people checking a car with their torches. A large man gets out of the car clearly angry at their vulture like tactics.

MAN
I won't tell you lot again, I'm in the game myself so sod off or I'll ram those torches up your arse

The traders then see Eddy's van and move over to it.

TRADER 1
Hurry up and get that urn on Eddy, I'm spitting feathers here

TRADER 2
And don't forget to save the crusts for my bacon butty I'm starving

Eddy waves back to them as he drives in.

TERRI
I take it they're the traders. They don't look that bad?

EDDY
Wait till they let the private sellers in! That lot will be all over their
cars like monkeys at the safari park

SCENE: EXT VAN- MORNING
The van is parked on grass and Eddy is rolling out round plastic table-tops from the back of the van and then setting them up with legs. Terri is visible through the vans hatch she is testing the tap on a steaming tea urn and then she is flipping bacon on a hot plate. She speaks to Eddy through the hatch.

TERRI
Eddy the first lot of sausage and bacons done, and the urns boiled.
Should I go over and let the traders know we're open for business?

EDDY
No need

Eddy goes behind the van and returns with a bugle which he then blows astonishingly well. Terri watches him from the hatch and is clearly impressed.

TERRI
Where in god's name did you learn to do
that?

EDDY
I was in the Sea Cadets for six months
until they found out that I couldn't swim

The Traders who were grouped at the entrance and others start appearing from various directions.

WOMAN
Looks at watch
You're later than usual getting your horn
Out Eddy, what's up is it the cold?

MAN
I heard you had trouble getting in?

EDDY
Yeah, new staff, they don't know how this game
works

MAN
Well, if they made you pay up front, then they at least know the bulk of it

EDDY
Cheeky sod

Eddy then calls the queue to attention

EDDY
Listen you lot I'm in a corner, I've had
to give my float in at the gate to get in
so, there's no change. So, can you do me a favour
and keep your dud 20's to yourself
and while you're at it can you get together
and help out on the loose change front

The traders all start getting out slummy and changing money with each other, Eddy enters the van and then he and Terri are rushed of their feet as trade is brisk.

SCENE: EXT VAN-DAY
The traders are walking away carrying food and drinks and Terri gets out of the van with a half full bin bag and walks off

SCENE: OVERHEAD DRONE -DAY
There is then an overhead drone shot of a car boot sale and then it goes overhead Terri at the bins then the drones view changes and makes a B line for the hatch of Eddy's van.

SCENE: INT VAN- DAY
Eddy is in the van washing a knife in a bowl of soapy water, as he does so there is a big splash as the drone lands in the bowl

EDDY
What the fu.......?

A man with a remote control appears at the hatch, he is leaning in and looking around sheepishly

MAN
Sheepish
Did a drone just come into your van?

Eddy fishes the drone out of the bowl and holds it up.

MAN
I'm so sorry, I've only just bought it and
I got a bit carried away. It never hurt you
did it?

EDDY
It just missed my head and its smashed all
my eggs!

Eddy points to a tray with 3 broken eggs on the floor. As the man attempts to pop his head in to look, Eddy grabs a broom and begins sweeping them out of sight. The man then takes out a rather full looking wallet and he offers Eddy two £20 notes.

MAN
Will that cover the damage?

Eddy takes one of the 20's

EDDY
That'll cover it

As the man walks away from the van with his wet drone Eddy folds the £20 note into four. And talks to himself and smiles as he does it.

EDDY
Right out of thin air

Terri enters the van as she does so Eddy pockets the folded note quickly.

TERRI
I've emptied the bins so shall I work the hatch
now?

EDDY
Yeah, but put some burgers and hot dogs on first and get a
couple of bags of chips out the cooler box as well

TERRI
Who the hell's eating hamburger and chips
at 9 o'clock on a Sunday morning?

EDDY
Times are hard, for most of the punters a car booty's the highlight of their week.
So, they like push the boat out. If you can call a two quid hot dog
pushing the boat out

As he is speaking Eddy's phone rings, he looks at caller ID and nods to Terri that he has to take the call.

Terri then spots a customer at the hatch reading the price list and she goes over and serves them as Eddy takes his call.

Eddy begins a one-way conversation over the phone.

EDDY
Hello, Mr Edwards how nice to hear from
you
cont
Yes, yes
cont
Not a problem at all,
Cont
I'd be delighted
cont
Have you sorted the sides out yet?
cont
Just so I can work out my stock
cont
As you know the Roundheads aren't fussy
eaters, but the Cavaliers do like a
ice spread

cont
The Cavaliers! That's great

cont
Do you mind me asking how you
found out about my services
you know for marketing purposes

cont
Oh you saw my website

Eddy's face drops when he hears they have seen the website.
But he picks up and talks positively.

cont
I'll of course email you confirmation
when I get back to my office

cont
No need to thank me I'm glad of the trade

cont
Well then you can rest assured, you're
Worries are over Mr Edwards

Eddy finishes the call then talks to himself in a worried tone.

EDDY
And mine have just started

Terri notices that Eddy looks concerned.

TERRI
Is everything ok?

EDDY
That was Keith Edwards, he's the head of
the local Civil War re-enactment society.
They're having their first big battle of
the season next weekend. One of the caters
has pulled out and he wants me to do it

TERRI
So that's good news then

EDDY
It is and it isn't. On one hand I can make
more in one day there than I can at 20 boot sales.
Especially doing the Cavaliers

TERRI
Why is there more of them?

EDDY
Less, they just like to splash out to get into character

TERRI
What about the Roundheads do they spend much

EDDY
Steady but they don't have anything fancy like onions or ketchup on their hot dogs
or milk or sugar
in their tea stuff like that. So you can save a fortune
on condiments alone

TERRI
Wow that really is getting into character

EDDY
I've had some just ask for dry hot dog buns
and a glass of water. I was on two minds whether to ask
them if they wanted salt in
their water?

TERRI
And when's that next Saturday?

EDDY
Forlorn
Yeah, that's the problem

TERRIE
Too short notice?

EDDIE
No, its more of a case of my website not matching my service
I wish it was because they saw this van and they at least knew
what they were really getting

TERRIE
It can't be that bad, what's the site called

Terrie takes out her phone and taps in the address as Eddy sheepishly recites it.

EDDY
E.D.D.Y Corporate Catering Specialists.com

Terrie looks at the site on her phone and her eyebrows arch as she speaks.

TERRIE
Wow you didn't hold back there did you

EDDY
I get the odd big job off it and sell it on, to the big boys you know
to make a few bob. But the Battle of Naseby is
the one I've always wanted to do myself

A female customer then appears at the hatch

CUST
How much are your chips?

EDDY
£1.50 a cone

The woman looks into her purse and it's all very dismal.

CUST
Could you just do me a like biggish bowl
of them for four quid?

EDDY
Go on then, take seat they'll only be 2
minutes I've just put a batch on

The woman goes over to a table she has three kids with her.

Terri notices how almost destitute they look and then watches as Eddy puts four hot dogs in buns on a paper plate and then fills a big bowl with all the fries and then he leaves the van. Terri is watching him from the hatch.

SCENE: EX TABLE- DAY

EDDY
Jovial
Here's your chips love and I've just had a phone order cancel so there's a few hot dogs there as well for you and the kids. They would have only gone to waste

The woman and kids are delighted and thankful and as Eddy turns to return to the van Terri busies herself with a cloth like she never saw it happen

SCENE: INT VAN- DAY:
Terri is at the hot plate. Eddy is using a plastic funnel to fill ac HP Sauce bottle with brown liquid from a larger plastic container that has Chinese writing on it, there is another container with red sauce in it and that has Chinese writing on the label as well.

Eddy finishes the sauces and then goes to the hatch and studies the people at the tables. Terri notices this and she wipes her hands on a tea towel as she joins him.

TERRI
Puzzled
What are you looking at?

EDDY
I'll let you into a secret, you'll learn
more about people by watching them
than you ever will from listening to them!

TERRI
In what way?

EDDY
I've learned more about people through selling hot dogs than I would
if I'd trained to be a psychiatrist

Terri points to a table with a young couple. The woman halves a burger with a plastic knife and shakes half the chips from a cone.
The woman then gives one to the man and she smiles as she eats. The man on the other hand who is wearing a Man U top looks glum

TERRI
Go on the show me, what about those two?

EDDY
She's going to boss that poor sod around for the
rest of his life

TERRI
How do you know that? She's just sharing
the food out

EDDY
What man do you know that orders half a burger?

TERRI
Good point

EDDY
They'll be selling to get money for their big day. Most of it will be his stuff
she doesn't want him using anymore.
And she's got him on a 'Shedding for the Wedding' diet.
l. Add the fact that Man U are playing at home
who do you thinks the boss?

TERRI
I take it you're married

EDDY
I was, I've been divorced for 17 years this Halloween

TERRI
How long were you married for?

EDDY
Four months

TERRI
Four months!

EDDY
To be honest it was nearer three, I just say four, so I don't look rash

TERRI
Not everything is meant to be, I've learned that myself, the hard way

EDDY
We were just from totally different worlds

TERRI
Then how did you even meet?

EDDY
University

TERRI
Surprised
You were at university?

EDDY
She was studying physics I was outside selling Hot Dogs.
I think she saw me as a bit of rough

TERRI
I wouldn't call you rough

EDDY
Winks
You should see me in a leather bomber jacket with my collar up

TERRI
Lucky there was no time for kids

EDDY
There was, that's the reason we had to get married in the first place. Tristan he's nearly eighteen

TERRIE
Tristan, that's a nice name

EDDY
I wanted to call him Colin to be honest

TERRI
Why is that a family name

EDDY
No, I've just always found it interesting

TERRI
Really?... Do you see him at all?

EDDY
Every Wednesday night and any weekend I'm not working which isn't many.
He used to love working with me on the van.
But his mother stopped him coming with me because she said
her parents thought that he was starting to sound 'Common'

TERRI
Oh, are they posh then?

EDDY
Her dad's a bank manager and her mother's a pain in the arse!
Anyway, what about you, are you married?

TERRI
No, I backpacked and worked my way around the world. Instead,
I've washed dishes in Sydney and elephants in Goa

EDDY
The furthest I've been to is Morocco and that was only because I
got drunk and took the wrong flight.
I was supposed to be going to Benidorm

TERRI
Admittedly I did it for a few years more than I should have.
Then I met a guy who I thought was the one

EDDY
And wasn't he?

TERRI
At first, but after two years at home in 'Steady Jobs' When we did see each other,
we'd end up arguing about crap like forgetting the dry cleaning.
It just felt stuffy given that we s met on a 'Moon Beach'

EDDY
That's a shame

TERRI
So, he took a promotion, and I went back to Goa, but it didn't work out.
They're just kids on the trails these days, I felt old
and I got tired of it all. So, I came home penniless
and I've been spending a few months on my cousin Claire's couch

Eddy gets a text and heads for the door.

EDDY
I'll be two ticks I've just got to pick
a pair of boots one of the regulars just
got their hands on for me

A brutish chav type man in a Chelsea top comes to the counter.

TERRI
What can I get you sir?

MAN
How much are the chips?

TERRI
£1.50 a cone?

MAN
Go on then but I want a full cone not
half of one and don't skimp on the salt & vinegar either!

Terri serves the man a cone of chips and he gives her a £10 note. Terri takes it and gives him the change. The man looks at the change angrily.

MAN
I gave you a 20 and you've given me
Change from a tenner!

Terri checks the cash draw to no avail.

TERRI
I'm sorry but you definitely gave me a ten
There's not even any twenties in the till

MAN
Are you calling me a liar?

Eddy returns carrying an orange Sainsburys carrier bag, as he enters the van, he's see's the stand- off between Terri and the man right away.

TERRI
This man said he gave me a 20 but it was
definitely a ten, there's not even any 20's
in the till

EDDY
Pats pocket
I know I took them out ten minutes ago, I always do

MAN
Bullying
Never mind covering for her I want my money! Don't make me have to come in and get it

Eddy puts the bag down and pulls a rounders bat from under the counter. He smiles confidently as he pat's it into his palm.

EDDY
You're welcome to try mate, but step on foot in here
and what I do to you is nice and legal

MAN
Scoffs
What you'll do to me?

EDDY
Yeah

MAN
bluster
Do you know who I am

EDDY
No and I'm not arsed either. But seeing you're trying to con tenners off hot dog vans
at car boot sales I'm going to hazard
a guess that you're not one of the Sopranos

The man is taken aback by Eddy's stance.

EDDY
Why don't you just sod, off and try
and find someone who's scared of you.
Because I'm not

The man is perplexed but then storms off as he does so he knocks over one of Eddy's plastic tables. Eddy smiles at that and then stores the bat away. The watching Terri is impressed.

TERRI
I really thought it was going to turn
nasty

EDDY
I've sold hotdogs outside pubs and clubs
till 4 in the morning since I was 15. I
know a phoney when I see one. I told you,
watch them before you listen to them

TERRI
What gave him away?

EDDY
Everything pointed to the fact that he was a tit. The Chelsea top just sealed it

TERRI
Alright then you've seen me in action so what do you make of me?

Eddy pretends to pull the folded £20 out of Terri's ear. He gives it to her, she is nearly in tears at how its folded.

As Eddy speaks a customer's impatient head pops through the hatch as they are clearly waiting to be served. Eddy has his back to this.

EDDY
You're one of life's nice people and
there's not many of them around

TERRI
You're not that bad yourself

Eddy is embarrassed by the way he blurted that out and he is grateful when the customer with their head through the hatch lets their impatience get the better of them.

CUST
Can I have a tea with six sugars please!

Eddy smiles and mutters to Terri as he goes to serve the customer

EDDY
If you want I can microwave you a
can of cola if you like

Terri smiles as does a lingeringly fond look at Eddy who is chirpily serving the customer.

SCENE EXT VAN-DAY
A steady flow of customers Eddy is serving Terri is outside clearing the tables and putting the rubbish in a black bin bag.

SCENE: INT VAN - DAY
Eddy is rolling in one of the plastic table tops. Terri is holding a box of burgers.

TERRI
These uncooked burgers Eddy? They've almost defrosted, shall I dump them?

EDDY
No put them in the cooler box, I cook any spares for next doors dogs

TERRI
A dog lover and a good neighbour, you
really are a bag of surprises

EDDY
The nosey sod hasn't got a clue. He's in the park with them
at half six every morning telling anyone who's up
that they're putting weight on, and he can't work out how?

Terri laughs as Eddy goes to the door and rolls in another plastic table top then goes out and comes back with the legs.

SCENE: EXT VAN- AFTERNOON

The tables and chairs are all gone the vans hatch is down and people are walking past carrying things like a tall lamp and a Space Hopper

SCENE: INTE VAN- AFTERNOON
Eddy is counting the notes and Terri is bagging the coins up.

TERRI
There's a 121 quid and odds in coins

EDDY
I've got 450 in notes not a bad day that

TERRI
Will that be enough to get your stock so
You can do that battle thing next week

EDDY
I've give some thought, it's too late to lay it off.
I'll email my apologies when
I get home. It's better than ringing him

TERRI
Why don't you at least give it a go, you've got nothing to lose

EDDY
You've seen my website; they'll be expectingan American style 12-wheeler
with an 8 foot serving hatch and all sorts of awnings.

TERRI
This vans not that bad

EDDY
Who are you trying to kid. I got threw out of the AA last
week when they saw it

TERRI
What if you covered the van with canvas like it's a tent

EDDY
They did have big tents on the
battlefield back in the day. In case
the King fancied a kip in the afternoon

TERRI
Yeah, they did

EDDY
You know what I've got 3 sets of massive purple velvet curtains from
the old picture house on London Rd in my lock up

TERRI
Purple velvet how more Cavileer can you get

EDDY
Half Price Harry left them there months ago. God knows
what he planned to do with them.

TERRI
You could easily make a big tent out of them, put a pennant on the roof and all that
You could put trestle tables out and cook all the stuff on gas bottle BBQs.
Throw a load of bunting up and you'll smash it

Eddy looks unsure as he speaks.

EDDY
I couldn't do it on my own, I could pay you if you could...

TERRI
What turn down the chance to have a laugh and make a few bob...

EDDY
It's a two-day event but most of the traders get there on the Friday to
iron out stuff. You'd have to stay in a tent
If that's ok

TERRIE
A tent

EDDY
nervous
Tents you know I'll get two, I don't mean...

TERRIE
Smiles
Relax you don't need to buy one I've got
one all you'll need to get is a sleeping bag

EDDY
I'll get another tent anyway, it'll take more than two of us
I'll bring my lad and rope in Dreary Derek he's
not everyone's cup of tea but he can put a shift in

TERRIE
Sounds like a plan

EDDY
excited
Oh, you'll love it, especially as
it's the Cavaliers. They all get drunk
and sing around the campfire all night
it's an amazing atmosphere

TERRIE
Don't the Roundheads do that as well

EDDY
They're in bed by 9. They don't allow fires either and
if you want to sing it has to be a hymn

TERRIE
You touched lucky there then

EDDY
I'll have to knock up a menu I won't get away with hot dogs and hamburgers with that lot

TERRIE
What were you thinking of

EDDY
Ye olde ham, legs of mutton that's sort of stuff and I'll have to price up
a piglet with an apple in its gob for the centrepiece

TERRIE
You'll need to do vegetarian and healthy options as well. They'll expect that I should imagine

EDDY
What like quinine and all that guff

TERRI
It's quinoa not quinine, quinine's what they treat malaria with

Eddy gets his phone out and attempts to go on- line as he speaks.

EDDY
I'll have to Google most of it. I
normally ask my lad about modern
stuff but not food, have you seen
what teenagers eat?

Terri gently gets Eddy to put the phone down

TERRI
Stop worrying, I've worked in more
trendy cafes across Far East and
Australia than I can care to remember.
I've even worked in a Sushi Bar, you know raw fish?

EDDY
I've seen that on telly mucky sods

TERRI
My claim to fame is I was working in one in Sydney when
the singer Seal came and he bought 12 salmon rolls off
me!

EDDY
I can see where he got his name from

TERRI
Seriously I can put a menu together for you with one eye on
the price and the other on the profit no problem

EDDY
Nervous
That would be great. Listen when you've done it do you reckon,
we could get together midweek and go over it?

TERRI
Get together?

EDDY
Panicky
I just mean go for a coffee in broad daylight and in somewhere
that's dead busy. It's just so that you can go over
it with me, slowly so that know what I'm getting?

TERRI
Smiles
I'll tell you what, why don't we go out for a meal in the evening instead?

EDDY
I'd really like that

TERRI
I must admit I do love good wine and exotic food

EDDY
Worried
Have you got anywhere special in mind in case I have to book a table?

Terri can see that Eddy is now worried about the potential cost of this exotic meal. Her reply is warm and caring.

TERRI
Well, you did say that you see your son on Wednesdays, so I was thinking Thursday.
It's Curry Club at Wetherspoons you can get a
curry and glass of wine for under 8 quid and I insist we go Dutch

EDDY
As long as it's after half 7 as I've got a wedding to go to in the day

TERRI
Who's getting married?

EDDY
I've no idea?

TERRI
Then why are you going?

Eddy becomes coy and edgy and then acts like he going to confess to a murder. Terri takes it deadly serious.

EDDY
You've got to promise me that you'll keep
this to yourself. Only me and the photographer
know about it so if it gets out...

Terri is worried and unsure, so she places her hand onto Eddy's arm fondly as she speaks in a reassuring tone.

TERRI
Eddy, I don't need to know everything...

EDDY:
I've got to tell someone it's killing me

TERRI
Sincere
You can trust me Eddy I won't tell a living soul

EDDY
I'm the lucky the Chimney sweep

TERRI
You're what?

EDDY
Last year I bought a set of chimney brushes
for 5 quid to clean my gutters. I had them leaning
against the van when a customer who was a wedding photographer
said it was really hard to get sweeps for his weddings
the next thing you know

Eddy holds out his hands in a Gaelic gesture

EDDY
Viola!

Terri is relived but is now trying not to laugh.

TERRI
So, you took him up on it?

EDDY
To right I did! I get 100 quid cash for
every wedding. I put soot all over my face
so that no one can recognise me in the photos

TERRI
What like your mates?

EDDY
smiles
I was thinking more of the Tax man

Terri is clearly interested and amused.

TERRI
So, what do you do? Do you just turn up
and then stand there with a brush?

Eddy is infused by Terri's genuine interest.

EDDY
No No, I've got the full hit, bike,
Brushes, waistcoat, granddad shirt,
cap, the lot. I did have a black cat
for the first few, but it leapt out
the front basket of my bike and I
never saw it again. In fact ...

Eddy stops talking and goes over and gets the orange carrier bag and he takes out a pair of old boots and proudly displays them to Terri

EDDY
I've been after a good pair of hobnail boots in a size ten for months.
The ones I have are going blunt

TERRI
What do mean going blunt?

EDDY
The photographer likes a few shots of me jumping
up and sparking my heels

TERRI
Amused
Are you any good at it?

EDDY
I am now! I often get an extra 50 to hang
back until it gets dark enough to catch the sparks on their wedding video

Eddy smiles as he starts up the van.

SCENE: STREET- AFTERNOON
The van is parked up and kids are playing football by it

SCENE: INT VAN- AFTERNOON
Eddy and Terri are talking as Terri has her mobile in her hand and is preparing to get out of the van

TERRI
I'll get cracking on the menu ideas
And send them over by email. That
way we'll both up to speed when
we go over it on Thursday

EDDY
Sincere
I can't thank you enough for this Terri. You know
for the first time in ages I feel like things
are on the up

Terri smiles as she does so a ball comes through the open van window and hits Eddy in the face. He is not hurt but he is shocked while Terri goes from concerned to trying to keep a straight face. Terri now has hold of the ball it is a cheap light flyaway type.

EDDY
What the fu, that's the second time today
I've nearly had my head took off

Terrie gets out of the van with the ball and throws it to the kids. Eddy smiles at how open and friendly she is with them.

TERRIE
There you go watch what you're doing
and don't run in the road, you could get knocked over

SCENE: EXT VAN - AFTERNOON

TERRIE
See you on Thursday night Eddy, 8 o'clock
At the spoons

EDDY
Great see you Thursday

SCENE: INT VAN - DAY

Eddy is driving with a smile on his face, He suddenly thinks on and begins to rummage through the glove box.

SCENE: BACK KITCHEN- DAY
Terri is drinking a coffee and looking at Eddys website on her laptop. As she looks at the screen she smiles fondly.
On the screen is a picture of Eddy next to a massive diner truck that bears no resemblance to his actual van

SCENE: INT VAN - DAY

Eddy has found the CD he wants in the glove box and then reads the back of it as he is driving. He then mumbles to himself

EDDY
Track 6 track 6

He puts the CD in and presses it to 6 with a flourish

SOUNDTRACK

10CC's I'm not in love

The music plays as the van drives to the end of the road and indicates and turns out of sight

END OF EPISODE

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