British Comedy Guide

BCG Fantasy Premier League 2022/23 Page 9

Quote: Steve Sunshine @ 13th August 2022, 7:13 PM

I've got shot of Sterling

Why Gillette him go?

That Luis Diaz goal should have been worth an extra point

Quote: Hercules Grytpype Thynne @ 12th August 2022, 11:31 PM

By the way, I have selected Salah, amongst others, and that indicates the kiss of death if you have him in your team, as usually when I do pick him, he plays like shit.

23 miserable f**king points. I might as well have saved my Wildcard, for what good it did me. I'm right - I'm just f**king useless at this lark.

BUT the good news is - I did get one prediction right (see above) I'm convinced now that he looks at my FPL team, before deciding how he's going to play.

ALSO, I WAS going to play him as triple captain ( a cert!!), but forgot about the rule of one chip per week ??????? (OK nurse, I'm ready for my injection now)

Quote: Steve Sunshine @ 15th August 2022, 10:54 PM

That Luis Diaz goal should have been worth an extra point

Very Fifa looking goal that.

Quote: Hercules Grytpype Thynne @ 15th August 2022, 11:47 PM

23 miserable f**king points. I might as well have saved my Wildcard, for what good it did me. I'm right - I'm just f**king useless at this lark.

It's one f**king week, mate - calm down.

Your team is okay - pretty good in parts - although why you played a Bournemouth Keeper and defender against City is hard to fathom.

Quote: Alfred J Kipper @ 11th August 2022, 10:08 PM

Could we possibly have less of this Witchfinder Godot bollocks and more FF FFS - NOT fantasy football scout. Good evening. ?

You get the Godot you deserve. I hate cheating.

Quote: Billy Bunter @ 13th August 2022, 5:25 PM

And again this week...

You are almost preternaturally unlucky when it comes to garnering negative points.

Put it this way, I wouldn't be standing anywhere near you in a lightning storm.

Quote: Stephen Goodlad @ 12th August 2022, 10:30 AM

I've gone for Bamford. Watched him last week and after a long lay off, he seemed sharp again. A punt I know but I'm well behind after only one week.

I wouldn't worry, the scores are all over the shop at the moment. It's not going to be any different next week.

Quote: Godot Taxis @ 16th August 2022, 12:23 AM

It's one f**king week, mate - calm down.

Your team is okay - pretty good in parts - although why you played a Bournemouth Keeper and defender against City is hard to fathom.

Ta, but I'm a simple soul, and they scored 20 points between them in the first week, and I thought they may pull it off again, but even more so.

AND, I was also thinking of the future games, not just the MC one. Logic or what?

I'm changing my team name to Crocked Utd. All were reported as fit during the week (bar 1) now I have 5 with no return date.

Shit, it's not going well for you Stephen, and you have my sympathy, as it sounds like a tale of my past woes - not that I'm on the sunny side of the street, presently (we live in hope ?)

Quote: don rushmore @ 14th August 2022, 6:55 PM

Why Gillette him go?

Pretty good pun that.

Don, I'm serving you a season ban for cheating.

• You deleted yourself from the Clique.
• You posted results after the first game, so had team but hadn't disclosed where it was.
• You told us what league you were in at 18:30 on Sunday after all the games were played.
• It's a league that no-one can join so you're using an old email address (second team).

Obviously if you can offer some mitigation I'll consider it.

How can you ban someone who isn't a member?

Quote: Godot Taxis @ 16th August 2022, 2:01 PM

Don, I'm serving you a season ban for cheating.

All of last season's hacked accounts were members of the same cheat site (lots of info online).

You were hacked, IIRC.

Thoughts?

Quote: don rushmore @ 17th August 2022, 3:06 AM

All of last season's hacked accounts were members of the same cheat site (lots of info online).

You were hacked, IIRC.

Thoughts?

Is that your mitigation - you're a cheat but so am I? ?

I'm not a cheat, but even if I were, that doesn't cancel out your cheating.

Incidentally, my hacking last season differed significantly in that I wasn't highly placed (nearly 2m at the time) and all my players were changed without using costing any points. That means whoever hacked my account hacked the FPL program too, something I told them about but of course they ignored.

For the avoidance of doubt I have never been a member of a 'cheat site', and I use zero tools to play fantasy football, beyond reading about players online. Instead of trying to smear me, how about some humility and acknowledgment for being an unsporting c**t?

Quote: Godot Taxis @ 17th August 2022, 2:37 PM

.................how about some humility and acknowledgment for being an unsporting c**t?

? Love it! You certainly have a way with words, Godot, and you cheered me up.

If there are cheat sites - how do they cheat?
Do they give you statistics about football players chances and form and who to pick then that's not really cheating. It's more - trying to get an advantage.
If they hack the FPL site and change points for certain members then that is cheating.

Either way, it's a game played by mainly anonymous players in *friendly leagues for bragging rights and fun *except ours
The skill and luck ratio is a big part of it.
If you use these sites and run away with the league, then your victory is hollow.

I really was going to give 'real prizes in the league I started.
A close relative of mine owns a Trophy shop and makes fabulous Cups, medals, resin, and crystal cubes.
But now there is a whiff of un-sportsmanship, I'm glad it's gone.

Like this.

Image

Yes, we've gathered how generous already (especially for a Yorkie) you were going to be - is that trophy hollow?

Speaking of hacking - twice now I have seen somebody play triple captain in the first few weeks. on a player who would be the last one you'd look at for that honour, and they gain mega points, which to me, means they must have hacked the site.

The crystal ones are engraved on the outside with anything you like giving a great prismatic look.
The resin ones are from a mould and have the letters (words) held inside on an invisible thread.

They would have looked good in your man-cave.

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