A house literally in the middle of nowhere.
A dwarf is unloading suitcases out of the boot of a private hire taxi and taking them into the house.
He passes two men outside who are standing talking . One is dressed slightly Bohemian with a cape and a hat, and the other is sharp suited.
The man in the suit hands over a set of keys to the man in the cape.
MAN
There you go Mr Thomas your deposit came through this morning the house is all yours
MR TOOMAS
It's Toomas actually, Dylan Toomas. And as we agreed there's no telephone , mobile reception or wifi, no passing traffic ,no aeroplanes in the sky, no cattle nothing .
MAN
As we discussed this is the most isolated spot in the entire county. If you can't write a book here no one can. You are completely alone.
As the MIDGET passes, he hears the last part of the man talking and he mumbles.
MIDGET
That's if you don't count the Wolfman ....
The SUITED MAN interjects
MAN
You just get the car started Old Ely!
TOOMAS looks a little nervous.
TOOMAS
Did he just say something about a wolfman?
MAN
Take no notice, he's just a superstitious peasant.
The SUITED MAN and the Midget drive off in the private hire taxi they wave as they leave.
TOOMAS looks around and takes in the air , but he is clearly rattled.
As the night draws in Toomas is on the scotch and is clearly uneasy. He is in his Pjs and cape sitting facing the roaring fire when he hears banging on the door.
TOOMAS nervously grabs a poker from the fireside as he goes to the door and shouts through it.
TOOMAS
Who's there?
JEGGERS
It's me Jeggers!
TOOMAS
Jeggers? I don't now any Jeggers. What's your full name?
JEGGERS
It's just Jeggers they never gave me anything else
TOOMAS
They? Who are they?
JEGGERS
Please let me in
Just then a Wolf howl can be heard loud and clear and Jeggers is in a total panic.
JEGGERS
Please god let me in
TOOMAS unlocks the door and Jeggers comes in. He has wild red hair and is wearing an old overcoat that is tied with string and he is bare footed. He heads over to the fire and warms himself.
TOOMAS
What are you doing out here? Did your car breakdown?
JEGGERS
I haven't got one!
TOOMAS
Well do you live locally ?
JEGGERS
God no who would live around here? I live way back and over.
There is another long low howl that pierces the night.
TOOMAS
What the f**ks that?
JEGGERS
Its best not to ask or repeat its name
TOOMAS
I don't even know its name?
JEGGERS
And I won't be telling you it either.
Jeggers then pushes the couch to block the front door and opens his coat and we can see that he has a large machete in his waistband and at least ten sets of glow in the dark rosary beads around his neck.
JEGGERS
I'll sleep here till it goes light, you get to your room , it won't pass me
TOOMAS is now slipping in his own shite and goes to his bedroom and pushes the wardrobe across the door.
The next morning TOOMAS wakes up and Jeggers has gone. Toomas gets dressed and sets of walking the 16 miles to the village.
ESTATE AGENTS OFFICE
TOOMAS is talking to the man in the suit and he is far from happy.
TOOMAS
There's the keys the sales off
MAN
You can't do that
TOOMAS
Just watch me, I'm never stepping a foot back in that house! I'll have a truck pick my stuff up by Wednesday as I'm going back to London on the next f**king train!
MAN
But if you do that you'll forfeit your deposit
TOOMAS
You can stick the 30 grand , I'm out of here full stop!
Toomas then storms off in a Bohemian huff. As he does so the man smiles and checks the computer for a phone number which he then calls
MAN
Hello is that Mr Mallard Turner
MT
This is he
MAN
It's Edwards Estate Agency Mr Turner, that house you looked at the one you thought was made for a painter? Its just come on the market so we'll have to act fast there's a lot of demand from other buyers but I did promise you in person so you could move in on Thursday if you put your deposit down today.
MT
Excellent
As the man finishes the call Jeggers comes out of the back office
MAN
Sweet as a nut yet again!
Jeggers takes off the red haired wig and smiles
JEGGERS
For a change with this next one why don't you be Jeggers? And I'll sell the house and do the wolf noises?
The man grabs the wig and smiles
MAN
No problem they do say that a change is as good as a rest. Oh and,don't forget to let Dave the Dwarf know that's he's on for another one next Thursday.
