Two middle aged mop haired men in broad pinstripe suits are waiting for respective cabs outside Whites Club in London.
MAN 1
I say good news on de Pfellel tying the knot again. All told I think that's the third time that he's been front and centre with the old Sky Pilot who's got the bible open on the applicable pages.
MAN 2
Good luck to him I say , he's had a terrible pandemic.
MAN 1
Yes, I heard he caught one himself while having to do all that awful meet & greet stuff you know with potentates from one ghastly country or another.
MAN 2
I suppose that's what comes with carrying the old red briefcase on behalf of Her Maj's finest.
MAN 1
Then he had terrible hullabaloo after they got old Lady B to splash out for a change of décor for the old flat above the shop.
MAN 2
I heard May had the place looking like a vicars mothers cottage only not as flash.
MAN 1
So much so that there was an offer made to use it as a scene from Middsommer Murders from Monty Egremont.
MAN 2
Monty his fag at Eton Monty?
MAN 1
The very same, apparently, he's now head of PR for his fathers latest purchase. Seems old Lord Egremont fancies himself as a media mogul as he bought an absolute bundle of channels.
MAN 2
So, what happened did Bojo get the dosh or what? I know he's got more bills than the ducks on Crofty Collins fathers estate and that has three fully stocked meres.
MAN 1
No, the Civil Service put the kybosh on it bad for moral and all that guff.
MAN 2
Anyhoo here's my cab I'll have to rush my companies won a contract to make PPE.
MAN2
PPE what's that?
MAN 1
God alone knows. The contract came up with the rations. I just drop my moniker on it and then it goes back down the line to someone who knows what it is? And how to do it and then they buy it and then Coutts let me know when my commissions landed in the Bahamas. What are you up to these days?
MAN 2
Nothing much I'm staying in Switzerland till the NHS contracts start flying around , there's no sense not to be skiing when you can be skiing.
MAN 1
I'd stand by your bed if I was you old bean. Now that Bojo's retied the knot he'll be looking for free flights and a spare divan instead of a sofa in the old chalet. He might even ask to borrow the twirlers to the old baronial pile.
MAN 2
No chance there my father wouldn't have her on parade.
MAN 1
Ahhh your pater , I take it's because she doesn't hunt?
MAN 2
Worse she's on the other side!
MAN 1
What she's with the old throwing marbles under police horses mob?
MAN 2
I've heard they have a dog, and she's insisted it's a vegan.
MAN 1
Nothing new there Boris's dog at school only lived off eating his homework and essays .
The two men part and get in their cabs.
