Int. Kitchen – 2 a.m
Gina is sat at a kitchen table and moaning loudly. Her legs are spread wide and she is heavily pregnant.
Gina: RICH! RICH! HURRY UP! I CAN’T WAIT MUCH LONGER.
Rich comes running in the kitchen.
Rich: Oh my god! I’m finally going to be a daddy! A little baby! A little me!
Gina: RICH! We’ve got to get moving.
Rich: Oh right, yes, of course! Now, just got to make sure that... Oh my god! WHERE’S THE CAT?!
Rich starts running round the room frantically looking in cupboards
Gina: WHAT?!
Rich: I can’t find the cat. We can’t leave the house without the cat being put away properly. I’ve got to find it. I MUST FIND IT!
Gina: RICH!
Rich: Just hang on, just hang on. He’s got to be in here somewhere.
Gina: RIIIIIIICCCCCCCCHHHHHHHH!
Rich: What?
Gina: We haven’t got a bloody cat.
Rich looks thoughtful for a second.
Rich: Oh yeah... THE OVERNIGHT BAG! We need to get your overnight bag! Where the hells that gone?! I had it this morning and...THE BEDROOM! Under the bed!
Rich runs out the room, up the stairs and then is heard thumping about upstairs.
Gina: RICH! RICH!
Rich: (O.O.V) I CAN’T FIND IT! THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT NIGHT OF MY LIFE AND SOMEONES HIDDEN THE OVERNIGHT BAG! WHY WOULD THEY DO THIS?!
Gina: RIIIIIIICCCCCCHHHHH!
Rich: (O.O.V) WHAT?!
Gina: IT’S IN THE CAR! YOU PUT IT IN THERE THIS MORNING.
The thumping upstairs stops, Rich runs down the stairs and into the kitchen.
Rich: Haha! Of course! The car, because Eddie from next door helped change the tyre this morning because I’d lost my spanner and then Eddie said he could help out, but would need to go and get some grease and then……..
Gina: THE CAR! NOW! THE CAR.
Rich: Oh right! Yeah! Sorry, I’m just a bit excitable as my little boy is on his way! The car...right...
Rich runs over to the kitchen window and looks out.
Rich: It’s gone! Someones stolen the car! What the hell are we going to do now?
Gina: RICH!
Rich: I know, I’ll ring an ambulance!
Rich runs over to the phone.
Rich: WHAT’S THE NUMBER?! WHAT’S THE BLOODY NUMBER?!
Gina: RIIIIIIIIIICCCCCCCHHHHHHHH!
Rich: What?!
Gina: We keep the car out the front, not in the garden!
Rich looks thoughtful for a second.
Rich: THE FRONT! THE FRONT! EXCELLENT!
Rich runs out of the kitchen.
Rich: (O.O.V) ITS THERE! HAHA! YESSSS!
Rich runs back into the kitchen and starts patting Gina’s stomach!
Rich: Don’t worry, son! We’ll have you out of there in no time! C’mon, Gina! Up you get.
Gina starts crying.
Rich: Oh I know you’re scared, but we’re all set now. We just have to get you to the car.
Gina: Get Eddie.
Rich: No, no, my dear. He fixed the wheel on the car this morning. It’s all fine now.
Gina: JUST GET EDDIE!
Rich: But why?!
Gina: Because he’s the father. He’s the father of my child!
Rich looks shocked and then passes out.
Gina: Rich? RICH?! (BEAT) EDDIE! EDDDDDDDDIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
© Ben Ricketts 2007
