British Comedy Guide

General Election 2019 Page 7

Unless it snows I'm predicticting high turnout in two and a bit weeks, there are a lot of desperate anti Brexit wishywashies wanting to pervert the course of democracy and claim to do it for democracy's sake. Still predicting lots of suburbanites to be beguiled by the new spice girl of British politics, the question is how many village folk she can take with her. Will orange rinse be the new trend in Royal Witteringonthames? She has to take Tory seats not just Labour.

As soon as she burst on the scene as their new leader I had a feeling she'd do well, loves the camera just as much as Boris, and is taking voters for even bigger fools. The prince Andrew saga has possibly helped her and Sturgeon too so I'm not veering too much from my original punt, I think it'll be a skinny win for Boris at best in terms of a Tory majority and getting Brexit done.

Alfred as soon as I read 'Wishywashees' I knew that I was dealing with a narrow minded bigot. Unfortunately both sides have them and that's whats making matters worse as common sense can't prevail while the 'Bigots & Idiots' think they have the megaphone, :(

Let you into a little secret here and with it I'm going to blow my own trumpet. Once, I never voted for the Conservatives. . I am a Social Democrat but you can't vote for them and my Tory MP gets in anyway, I quite like him as a man. Young, he is prepared to lean to the One Nation stuff while putting up with my e-mails in a tolerant way. I tell you. The moment he stopped replying in the standard form to me I knew that my stuff was getting through one way or another. That is the way it works. So anyhow this pathetic excuse of a Tory manifesto turns up (which I told him I predicted) and I'm thinking there is no way on earth they have taken my tiny fringe areas on in such a short document. And yet spectacularly they have.

You won't get to hear this in the media as they think it is irrelevant. And he won't tell me I was relevant in this although I absolutely was. You might hate the idea that there will be a Tory Government and assume that there is nothing you can support. Well, if it happens, and that is a big if, I can say now that in that document which commits to virtually nothing there is a commitment to increasing the number of our National Parks and AONBs. And that is all me. It is ALL me. I told my MP to feed it through that it's like motherhood and apple pie and wouldn't cost anything. So if nothing else, we will have more of our wonderful countryside protected. And I did it!!!!! Cos I know that privately he knows I talk a lot of sense (and may be a bit frightened of me because I also critically throw in his face aspects of the porn industry). Horseradish - old fashioned green - others can do climate change - with priorities on our lovely coastline, countryside, and animals. Not only have I protected it for the next generations but insisted it is expanded. And he knows he really needs me on side.

First he was a chlorinated chicken now he's an oven ready turkey for the Christmas chop. I sense panic and leadership maneuverings in the Labour camp. It's which party they hand their seats to now that decides the election and Brexit.

It's very strange to have someone who seems very much a Brexiter in charge of the second referendum. But then look at Teresa May. On second thoughts, don't...

It reminds me of the 2016 US Presidential Election, with two of the most shockingly poor and despised candidates ever slugging it out. And that election gave us possibly the worst president in US history, so I dread to think what this one will give us.

Quote: chipolata @ 27th November 2019, 11:40 AM

that election gave us possibly the worst president in US history

James Buchanan usually gets that accolade.

Pretty unfair interview from Andrew Neil last night - but JC should have a) expected it & b) handled it a whole lot better. He just looked grumpy and uncooperative. And if he was any sort of politician he would just throw a few of his anti-zionist Socialist Worker pals under the bus and be done with it. He literally hands the opposition ammunition.

Lazzard I agree about his SWP cronies.
But on another note what's got me puzzled is that Trump was elected by saying that the 'Deep State' was against him, while his two bob counterpart Johnson is being helped by the 'Deep State'
I have never seen so many people of alleged rank set out against him and while he may be many things a racist is not one of them , did you see what John Bercow said about him?
Meanwhile a man who has journalists beaten up, a known racist who burns £50 notes in front of the homeless and who bought water cannons to use on the people of London is hidden from view while the media rip the other guy to bits for him.
Then again its not like Johnson has any policy to talk about anyway.

ry came out

As I've said before, I can see no logical explanation for the Labour Party's tolerance of Jeremy Corbyn as their party leader. I suspect there is something going on that none of us knows about.

Politics is not about right and wrong, it's about getting votes and not getting votes.

When a Conservative or Labour Party leader is unpopular among moderates in the run-up to an election, it's time to find a new leader - but Jeremy is still in there plugging away.

One possible explanation is that he is somehow assured victory in this forthcoming general election - not necessarily with an overall majority, but perhaps by leading an alliance.

Of course, that is not something one can logically expect, based on current polling figures - but what other explanation is there?

Is it possible that the Labour Party does not want to win the election and thus become the party that took us out of Europe or the one that kept us in? Laughing out loud

Quote: Nogget @ 27th November 2019, 12:13 PM

James Buchanan usually gets that accolade.

Buchanan had better hair.

You can apparently vote for the late Bruce Forsyth. https://www.facebook.com/111035667712/posts/10157421912302713/

Quote: Paul Wimsett @ 27th November 2019, 5:22 PM

You can apparently vote for the late Bruce Forsyth. https://www.facebook.com/111035667712/posts/10157421912302713/

When the result is announced, no matter how many votes Tom Tugendhat has attracted, the returning officer is bound to turn to the audience and ask "Didn't he do well?" Laughing out loud

Rood Eye:

No conspiracy. Corbyn has a very, very nice voice. No one has pointed this out. It is a good broadcasting voice which is only let down by the way in which he says "saze" rather than "sez". I've never bought in to the argument that the saze/sez thing is about dialect except in certain parishes in the north which do not apply to him. And as a fan of Sez Les I find that one aspect deeply offensive. I want an apology for his institutional anti Les-ism and his inability to play the ol' Joanna .

Next, chillwave. I am so pleased you asked me about that one even though you didn't. So let me explain. I think it is fair to say that we are as far removed here from the likes of Ben Bradshaw as it is possible to be and both chillwave kind of guys.

First, the way in which the one hour plus of chilled music on YT with Bojo wittering on about "Get Brexit Done" (and it needs to get done in my humble opinion) is a wow with young commuting executives. Apparently it shows Central Office as having arrived with the times. Except only I know it is a direct steal from Tony Benn. I am less party political than I am susceptible to figures of substance so, yes, I did stand once in a field of Somerset cows and bishops into Radiohead listening to the "prophet" speak. A little later I took myself off on my own to Glastonbury town to see what actual Glastonbury was like. Aim one - to find God in nature. Aim two - to avoid heroin. Both of these objectives were fulfilled.

Loads of stories there from boredom in wells to an honorary membership of a clan of people who walk their dogs on their end of a string and especially when really, really pissed stumbling alone up the Tor to get the vibes there and walking in on two people in the dark sucking and blowing on mid-period instruments. Lovely unexpected music but they felt the need with scowls to scarper. It was as if I had wandered in on what was supposed to have been their exclusive domain.

After which, I laid on my back all alone looking at the stars and praying to Van Morrison before returning to my tent on the ring road. It was there incidentally that I chose the names of the son and daughter I would never have. Arthur Rune and Melanie Crop Circle. Anyhows, back in the town on the next day I found the CD Tony Benn's Greatest Hits and I do mean Benn rather than Bennett. 2003. I also bought some obscure dub in that shop so I had absolutely been captivated by the area's magical aura. And what pisses me off is the bestest track on that Benn thang is the one in which he lays so heavily into the EU. If he were alive I believe he would have driven several tanks into Mr Corbyn and Momentum. And yet it's not on bloody You Tube. That is the real conspiracy. So you will have to do with this one and compare notes..

Tony Benn's Hits - Prophecy, c. 2003 - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xSEK7tcn4_w

Boris - Get Brexit Done, 2019 - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cre0in5n-1E&t=1402s

Incidentally I will tell you how we have all been duped.

Benn Snr believed rightly that the worst aspect of our EU membership was that the EU was totally constrained by its subservient relationship with the US and its big business. Now with a sleight of hand we are told falsely that EU is the antidote to US constraint. In parallel, Brexit politicians argued that leaving the EU would open the whole world to us. Suddenly with an equal sleight of hand it has all from their mouths become a case of what deal we can do with the US.

I was once asked if I was anti US. Not at all. Nor am I anti EU. But my view is that Brexit should be concentrating on improving our links and opportunities with the world beyond the EU and the US. Benn was coming from that position as a true internationalist. That aspect has now been removed by all. The lizard race is on both sides. Trickery. I blame Davos.

The Big Big You Gov Poll

Which was published at 10pm.

This is by light years the most significant one prior to the election because it is massive compared with all the other ones. It is also a very complex thing which digs down on personality types and into individual constituencies. It was the one which when released at the last election sent shock waves through the Tories and was so accurate ultimately it just knew the outcome. I am surprised at the limited press on it so far. What this year's one says is a Tory majority of just over 60 but with 30 seats so close that they are almost impossible to call. If they were to go the other way we have folks another hung Parliament. Which has been my prediction all along. SNP looking quite good. LDs looking lousy but I sense something weird will happen. I just have a feeling that Lab and LD/Green will be able to form a majority of about one with LD/ Green on no more than DUP had, ie 10 seats. This will bypass SNP influence but still turn everything back into utter mayhem. One death of an MP in the first month and it is again chaos central, How wonderful - not - for the humble stability cravers.

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