Geraint and Callie visit a relationship therapist:
The Relationship Therapist
Yes, I like that.
Not only are your scripts funny but, but your actors are leagues ahead of most "actors" in Youtube sketches.
In fact, they're better than a lot of actors I've seen on the telly!
Thanks for that Rood Eye. They have both been on the telly before funny enough.
I'm hoping to make lots more sketches with them as well.
I had to watch it twice to get the joke, but very good. You're not a bad actor yourself, Carlos! Get rid of Rhod Gilbert, you'd never be off the telly.
Do you think he needs to repeat the "What bought you here" line to the husband?
I think you could get away with it.
Like Beaky, I only got it on 2nd viewing.
Quote: Lazzard @ 19th May 2019, 2:13 PMDo you think he needs to repeat the "What bought you here" line to the husband?
No, absolutely not (in my opinion, of course).
It's a dreadful thing for a comedy writer to bang a joke home with a sledgehammer or to signal its impending arrival with a fanfare of trumpets.
I really don't think the dialogue in that sketch can be improved.
If he had repeated the question, my immediate reaction would have been to think "Oh, for f**k's sake, Carlos!"
He didn't repeat the question, however, and so my immediate reaction was to think "What beautifully economical comedy writing! Well done, Carlos!"
My impression from reading posts on BCG is that both Lazzard and beaky are somewhat brighter than the man on the Clapham omnibus. Accordingly, I think their failure to get the joke on the first viewing was due to some unusual and temporary mental fogginess. If they'd come to it on a different day, I'm sure they would have got it the first time.
It will be interesting to see whether or not other members got the joke first time around.
Quote: Rood Eye @ 19th May 2019, 2:50 PMI think their failure to get the joke on the first viewing was due to some unusual and temporary mental fogginess.
Either that, or it needs the 2nd line...
Entirely in agreement with Lazzard, it needs the second line - in fact I was going to make the same point myself.
Cheeky nit, Rood Eye!
It works for me with just the one instance of the line in question. For me...if it was to be repeated, there would have to be a small snippet of dialogue beforehand...or at least a pause for confusion on Geraint's face, as just repeating it again would feel too forced. They're at relationship counselling, so it wouldn't be out of place for the guy to act a bit more flippant...like...
Counsellor: "...and Geraint?"
(Geraint has already zoned out, not even bothering to listen to what Callie is saying about him)
Geraint: Mutters..."Sorry...what?"
(Callie shakes her head disapprovingly towards the counsellor for him to acknowledge Geraint's indifference)
Counsellor: What brought you here?
The only trouble is the line about him taking everything so literally may be lost just a little too far in the past to properly support Geraint's answer. That's why running his answer more quickly after hers works best for me.
It's a funny sketch. Nice and quick...I like it.
Thanks all, I know what you mean with repeating my question, I did contemplate it for a while and I also realised that people would not get the joke first time around and may not even get it after watching it twice.
I didn't want to repeat the line again as I thought it would have lost the quickness of the sketch and it would have felt like asking for 2 different answers if that makes sense?
Quote: Carlos Manwelly @ 20th May 2019, 5:03 PMThanks all, I know what you mean with repeating my question, I did contemplate it for a while and I also realised that people would not get the joke first time around and may not even get it after watching it twice.
I didn't want to repeat the line again as I thought it would have lost the quickness of the sketch and it would have felt like asking for 2 different answers if that makes sense?
I agree. What reason would the counsellor have to repeat the same question...seeing as Geraint's sitting right next to Callie, so it's assumed he should have heard it. He'd need a subtle prompt to repeat himself...otherwise why would he?
Quote: Old Lady Leg @ 20th May 2019, 8:07 PMWhat reason would the counsellor have to repeat the same question?
There's only one reason he'd repeat the question: he'd repeat it if failure to do so would mean that a significant number of viewers wouldn't get the joke.
I've already said that, to me, repetition seems absolutely and utterly unnecessary.
The problem is that Lazzard and beaky believe repetition is necessary and, because both of them know what they're talking about when it comes to comedy sketches, I am forced to wonder whether or not I myself know what I'm talking about. 
The interesting and unusual thing is that this disagreement isn't about subjective issues such as what's funny and what isn't, or what's offensive and what isn't, or indeed about anything else that is a matter of opinion: the disagreement is about which one of the two camps is right about a matter of demonstrable [/i]fact[/i].
I believe that when a large group of relatively normal people see that sketch, almost all of them are going to get it.
Lazzard and beaky believe (if I interpret their position correctly) that if a large group of relatively normal people see that sketch, lots of them are not going to get it.
Unlike most arguments about comedy on BCG, this one can be settled by experiment: if a significant number of members view the sketch and, perhaps, invite a few of their friends to view the sketch, we will have a very good idea whether or not it needs to be rewritten.
I'm going to put an invitation in the general discussion forum.
Not bad at all, Carlos.
However, I too needed a second view.
Maybe start the sketch with Callie's statement, then the therapist's question direct to Geraint followed by Geraint's response?
I got it first time. Nice sketch Carlos.