I have had the worst week ever of foot in mouth disease.
Earlier this week I was having a pinot in my local when my group started talking cartoons. I mentioned Hong Konk Poohey, then went about doing the actions & gasping high ki chi dicca dica dica die, or whatever my version of him was. Anyhoo I recieved a tap on the shoulder & was called a racist by a Chinese guy or Japenese. I suppose me not knowing which one he was will make me racist too. I tried to explain I was doing an impression but he wasnt having it. I couldnt argue with the guy to much as I had no clue really to what he was saying. So anyhoo Tues pm I was a racist.
Then On Thurs I had an altercation with a woman in Homebase. I accidently caught her face with my brand new curtain pole & she threw a mental. I apologised several times until I got to the point of being bored with the word sorry. So in the end out of sheer frustration I told her to Fookoff.
Later that same day while at a petrol station I got talking to my sons ex teacher. We were yakking about my boys & he was telling me how great they were etc. He said his wife always asks after them too. (I have never met this guys wife). Anyhoo I walked towards his car while talking & there in his passenger seet was a lady with a big black eye. Yes it was the woman I beat in Homebase. A woman who always asks after my boys. A fellow teacher. So Thurs I was a thug & a bitch to a perfectly nice woman.
I have decided that for 7 days & 7 nights I am not leaving this house.
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