"Mums Make Porn"

This is a new three-part documentary series from Channel 4.

It involves five mums who are disgusted by the violence and misogyny of Internet porn and who have, accordingly, decided to make their own porn film which will involve things like foreplay, romance and various other things favoured by women but historically eschewed by men (except when trying to make a good impression).

One of the women is a Malaysian Christian who has grown to adulthood without ever hearing sex mentioned by another family member. My favourite quote from her is "Close-ups of genitalia? Why?"

The other four appear to be from more-normal backgrounds.

The one who seemed to me to be a bit of a goer surprised me when she visited the set of a porn film where a man and woman were having "normal" intercourse and, as soon as it was over, she ran out into the street and vomited several times. I think she mumbled something about bodily fluids.

When the mums eventually get around to making their own film, it will be shown to various members of the industry, the public and friends.

I can hardly wait.

Trousers round your ankles eh

I quite fancy the one on the left!

And you say you've made porn videos before, Rood...?

Quote: Paul Wimsett @ 22nd March 2019, 3:43 PM

And you say you've made porn videos before, Rood...?

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I'm not sure what you mean by "made" but I can assure you I have never appeared in a porn film and I have never been involved in the production of one.

Actually, my interest in porn films is minimal and always has been - simply because I find absolutely no attraction in professional porn actresses and I have no desire to look at men's bits under any circumstances.

I know millions of people would disagree but, for me, sex isn't a spectator sport.

You're the one fancying porn stars!

Quote: Paul Wimsett @ 22nd March 2019, 4:48 PM

You're the one fancying porn stars!

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No, I'm not.

The ginger woman on the extreme left of the above photo is not a porn star.

Unless I'm very much mistaken, she and the others are going to produce, direct and generally create a relatively tasteful porn movie but will not appear in it themselves.

This is madness!

It's kind of strange that women of a certain vintage who were so keen to overthrow the old establishment by being liberated and screwing the Rolling Stones and the Groundhogs in bogs at gigs at age 15 have gone all Mary Whitehouse and more so. None of them did anyone any favours, let alone themselves.

In parallel, the tossers' tax arrives later this month. This will require people to obtain porn passes at newsagents and be hounded out as pariahs or to hand over their credit card details to companies that are directly linked to Pornhub etc which have long since promoted candle wax, urine and multiple sperm torture. That is, on the basis that it is a metaphor for release of abuses in the neoliberal semi Dickensian workplace and that no one will dare to speak about either. Or else whatever the tatts in their armpits they will go all fluttery and rouge like a big girl's blouse. Wank or get furious with the boss and end up in jail.

A plague on them all. Life was far better when you could pick up a bird at a tea dance, however ugly as society might erroneously see it, and sex was regarded less as competitive Hitlerian entertainment and more as a necessary alternative on an occasional Saturday night to genital mutilation and major heart surgery.

It should be banned really other than for procreation. In this case but no other whatsoever, Islam is right. I don't see why we should countenance a bunch of immaturely conflicted stage struck wannabees making even more money from it while gaining undue attention for lower than average looks and blatant double standards.

I naturally assume in Prime Ministerial style that this will command a consensus. Tbh, I'm 56 and have none of the problems that are supposedly associated with men of my age but it doesn't bother me now that I happily share my bed with a squirrel. Otherwise, the teenage regularity of rampant nocturnal erections would be an absolute bloody nuisance, especially when wearing tight pants, trampoline or not.

This...

Quote: A Horseradish @ 22nd March 2019, 6:57 PM

I don't see why we should countenance a bunch of immaturely conflicted stage struck wannabees making even more money from it while gaining undue attention for average looks and double standards.

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What's going on tonight! As if it's not bad enough to be rummaging through a thread talking about porn and bodily fluids...I skip back to another tab and immediately scroll down to Sainsbury's trying to sell me something made from nut butter. I give up.

Quote: Old Lady Leg @ 22nd March 2019, 7:20 PM

This...

What's going on tonight! As if it's not bad enough to be rummaging through a thread talking about porn and bodily fluids...I skip back to another tab and immediately scroll down to Sainsbury's trying to sell me something made from nut butter. I give up.

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Pardon me?

I lost the salient point after the word "rummaging".

Quote: A Horseradish @ 22nd March 2019, 7:26 PM

Pardon me?

I lost the salient point after the word "rummaging".

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It quite accurately describes my general reading technique. I'm not a careful reader.

Quote: Old Lady Leg @ 22nd March 2019, 7:49 PM

It quite accurately describes my general reading technique. I'm not a careful reader.

View original

Oh well, fair enough,

I could agree that the ginger bint is hot but only conceptually.

I am happy enough with my Nibbles.

It's the cuddles mainly.

When it comes to porn, I think what most mums object to is the fact that their sons and daughters can access an almost-infinite amount of material that gives their children an entirely wrong impression of what "normal" sex is all about. In particular, it gives boys an entirely wrong impression of how sexual partners are to be treated in a normal relationship and it gives girls an entirely wrong impression of the sort of services normal girls are expected to provide at the drop of a hat for any boy beset by an erection he needs to get rid of.

I've certainly not led a sheltered life but some of the stuff that's happening on some of these websites is enough to make me regurgitate my last meal. I mean, what sort of minds dream this stuff up?

Please don't think I have significant personal experience of these websites: I don't - but there are many relatively normal sites upon which the most astonishing adverts appear uninvited!

In the days before the Internet, the vast majority of young men treated the vast majority of young women at least reasonably well - partly because that was the way they'd been brought up to behave and partly because if they didn't treat them at least reasonably well the chances of getting into their knickers were pretty much zero.

Thanks to the Internet, however, young girls are growing up to think that if, during any sex session, they're not supplying bodily accommodation to two (and preferably three) boys at once, they're obviously not very attractive.

The Internet has a lot to answer for.

Quote: A Horseradish @ 22nd March 2019, 8:18 PM

It's the cuddles mainly.

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I cuddle my dog and my kids. I guess, one day, they'll all be gone and I won't even have cuddles. Then...maybe I'll be more inclined to eat the odd knob of nut butter.

Romance and cuddles, eh? Ooh...I know a porn about that!