Plenty of Fish

Why do people choose to "date" in their more mature years?

I can understand that almost all of us need some sort of companionship either on an ongoing basis or just as an occasional thing but companionship can be provided by a person of either gender whereas electronic dating apps are usually employed to find partners of the gender one has historically been attracted to in a sexual way.

Speaking for myself, I'd be just as happy to go out for a drink with a mature man as I would with a mature woman because the amount of sex I'd be wanting from either of them would be exactly the same - zero!

However, I feel I might very well be in a minority in that respect.

Having perused more than a few dating profiles, it seems that a great many mature men and women are as keen on intimate shenanigans with people of their own age as they ever were when they were younger.

I find it difficult to believe although all the evidence suggests that such is the case.

Just where do people draw the line when it comes to the age of potential intimate partners?

I mean, the thought of sneaking up a flight of stairs, quietly opening a door and then leaping upon the decomposing remains of Norman Bates's mother as she moves gently back and forth in her rocking chair is, to say the very least, not very appealing.

It would be interesting to hear what other people have to say on the subject.

I started Internet Dating when I was about 53 including Plenty of Fish.

I met a woman who I had a relationship with for 6 years until she died, I won't give you the details.

Then I met another woman through another site and we've been together but living apart for 3 years now.

Everything is great thank you.

Any more thoughts on this Rood?

Quote: Chappers @ 28th February 2019, 10:46 PM

Any more thoughts on this Rood?

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Yes, my initial reaction was one of pleasure that such sites had served you well on no fewer than two occasions. I was pleased for you personally and I was also pleased to know that modern electronic dating methods are not the sole preserve of the younger generation.

Under all normal circumstances, my second reaction would have been to come back with a flash of brilliant wit that would set the whole forum rocking with laughter. However, given that your largely positive post does contain a reference to something that must've saddened you deeply, I thought that to come back with anything remotely resembling repartee would have been in poor taste.

I can, however, continue in serious (and hopefully simultaneously amusing) mode by saying that my attitude to dating in later life is based very much upon Groucho Marx's assertion that he refuses to belong to any club that would accept him as a member.

Essentially, any woman young enough and attractive enough to make me want to date her is going to be looking for much younger men than my good self. I do get offers from women wanting to meet me (some even say that mine is the funniest and most eloquent profile they have ever read) but, in all honesty, they all look too old and/or stuffy and/or dull - even though most of them are younger than I am!

And here's the worst part of it: most of these women are looking for some sort of physical relationship and, although I'm not yet totally defunct in that department, I can only respond appropriately (if you understand what I mean) with a suitably attractive partner. It's virtually impossible for a man to fake it - simply because you can't push a piece of string.

Let me be clear that a woman doesn't have to be a "good looker" in order for me to go out with her for a drink or a meal and have a thoroughly enjoyable social evening. Having said that, if she's looking for anything more than a platonic relationship, she'd be better off with someone else - and that's not me speaking, it's biology speaking.

I'm doomed, I tell you - doomed!

Are you saying you only fancy young girls in school uniforms?

Quote: Briosaid @ 1st March 2019, 8:50 PM

Are you saying you only fancy young girls in school uniforms?

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No, having given the matter further thought, I'm saying that I think I've reached the point where I'm wondering why I ever fancied anybody at all, regardless of age.

I can remember reaching the stage at which, in order to enjoy sex, I had to imagine my partner was somebody else.

I can remember reaching the stage a few years later at which, in order to enjoy sex, I had to imagine I was somebody else.

And then, some years after that, I reached the stage at which I couldn't understand why, in order to enjoy sex, anybody would go to the trouble of even involving somebody else.

I think it's all over.

(ALL: it is now!)

This is so sad.

Strewth Rudy, I had you down as a 20-something, like this chap I knew at university. "Physical" needn't be limited to thrice daily 50-position marathons. It could just be something nice and romantic, like scrubbing your partner's back with a soothing liniment of mule-scented wasp semen.

Quote: Rood Eye @ 1st March 2019, 9:12 PM

I reached the stage at which I couldn't understand why, in order to enjoy sex, anybody would go to the trouble of even involving somebody else.

I think it's all over.

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So it's a case of "So long and thanks for all the fish".

I've just had an email from Plenty of Fish to say that someone has added me as a favourite.

She's no spring chicken but she doesn't look bad, all things considered.

The snag is she's a widow and one of life's greatest truths is that nothing made of flesh and blood can ever win a fight with a ghost.

Many years ago, Roger Daltrey complained about being "a substitute for another guy".

I've been in that position and I can tell you this - I won't get fooled again.

(Do you see what I did there?)

Quote: Rood Eye @ 2nd March 2019, 12:52 PM

Many years ago, Roger Daltrey complained about being "a substitute for another guy".

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Was your dad black?

Ol' Rog turned 75 yesterday. Doug Sandom (original drummer for The Who, later replaced by Keith Moon) passed away a few days ago on the day after his 89th birthday.

Quote: Rood Eye @ 2nd March 2019, 12:52 PM

The snag is she's a widow and one of life's greatest truths is that nothing made of flesh and blood can ever win a fight with a ghost.

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Balderdash. Suggest you re-watch some of The Ghost and Mrs Muir. Many unhappily married women are overjoyed when their miserable old unpleasant husbands kick the bucket, as they have a new chance at happiness. They're certainly not going to be constantly negatively comparing dashing young witty Rudy to that bad-tempered old alcoholic who finally popped his clogs.

Quote: DaButt @ 2nd March 2019, 2:57 PM

Was your dad black?

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Yes, but sadly the only thing I inherited from him was an abiding distrust of the criminal justice system.

Quote: Kenneth @ 2nd March 2019, 3:29 PM

Many unhappily married women are overjoyed when their miserable old unpleasant husbands kick the bucket, as they have a new chance at happiness.

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That makes sense actually.

The situation is clearly not as straightforward as it seemed.

I'm beginning to suspect that the simple things I see are all complicated.

I've thought about joining dating sites but never done it. I like the idea of meeting people with similar interests but I prefer it to be spontaneous and meeting someone at random on the street. Not in a prostitute way.

Quote: Definitely Tarby @ 2nd March 2019, 8:50 PM

I've thought about joining dating sites but never done it. I like the idea of meeting people with similar interests but I prefer it to be spontaneous and meeting someone at random on the street. Not in a prostitute way.

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I have to admit I've never engaged the services of a prostitute although, many years ago, two friends and I would occasionally drive over to Manchester's red light district and have a chat to a couple of girls - one of whom had provided professional services to one of my friends on a previous occasion.

She charged £2, ten bob (50p in today's money) of which went to the owner of the room that she used for the purposes of her business.

On one occasion, she told us how, as a very young girl, she used to see prostitutes on the streets of her own hometown and think they were absolutely disgusting.

"Judge not lest ye be judged", I suppose?

Moving on, I've never actually had a girlfriend from an Internet dating site but, before the Internet was invented, I had a couple from the lonely hearts column of the Manchester Evening News. Both were presentable enough to look at but neither was quite right in the head.

99% of all my previous relationships have resulted from meetings in normal circumstances - but all those relationships were established in the days before women were taught to believe that 99% of post-pubescent male strangers are highly dangerous individuals who are not to be looked directly in the eye under any circumstances, normal or otherwise.

I think perhaps I need a woman comedian - but not some bitter, twisted, politically correct, man-hating harridan. She'd have to be of mature years and she'd have to be extremely talented.

Sadly, that narrows it down to Joan Rivers or Phyllis Diller - and they're both dead!

Oh well, I expect something will turn up.