Fiddler on the roof

A man in a three piece suit is standing on the roof of a house when the householder comes out and is more than slightly irate.

HH:
What the f**k are you doing on my roof?
MAN:
I'm sorry my sat nav is broke so I'm trying to get my bearings
HH:
Get off my f**king roof now!
MAN:
Make me

The house holder runs to the side of his shed and gets a ladder and climbs up on the roof and goes over to the man who is now leaning on the chimney smoking a pipe.

MAN:
I hope this isn't going to get violent

HH:
It will do if you don't get off my roof right now!

The man goes down the roof and gets onto the ladder and climbs down. The house holder is standing on the ridge of his roof with his hands on his hips looking smug.
The man then takes the ladder away and goes into the house and comes out with a wallet he counts the money out of it as he walks away down the street.

The householder is sat on the roof as a police car comes and he waves it down

The police sergeant gets out of the car and looks up at the man

SERGEANT:
Don't tell me there was a well dressed man on your roof?

The householder nods

The sergeant shakes his head forlornly as he leans into the patrol car to speak to his colleague

SERGEANT:
He gets them every bloody time, let the fire brigade know will you PC Swan

I like this, it'd work well visually.

Thanks Beaky, I'm not sure about the swearing though to be honest as I do tend to use it a lot in my short ones .

nowt wrong with a bit of swearing, mi duck.

To be fair Beaky I only use it in the short ones that I just write when I come, on here. I never use it in my scripts . perhaps I should as I have got more pilots than Ryan Air and I've never so much as seen the runway

I liked it as well Teddy, particularly the line 'I hope this isn't gonna no to get violent'.

You'll have noticed since you came back that entries in Criteque are pretty few and far between nowadays

Thanks for the feedback Will , In fairness I work writing live commentary on Facebook these days and I do a straight 8 hour shift 6 days a week on a page with 35 million viewers per hour. So its gruelling and low paying and while its always diverse I need to get back to my own writing .

How did Harry Hill get up on the roof. How does he know its not in multi occupation. Most peeps would just throw him an umbrella.