Scene: You're meant to believe this is the call centre of Cun Life Insurance, where the cheerful smiling actress telephonist answers your call............
Actress Telephonist : "Good morning, Cun Life Insurance. How can I take your money help you?
Actor Twat: "Ah yes, I've just burnt my house down after experimenting with cleaning my oven with petrol, and thought I really should take out some life insurance"
Actress Telephonist : "That's fine, and it's what we are here for. I just need to ask you some life style questions"
Actor Twat: "I'm 96, am a drinker and smoke 40 fags a day"
Actress Telephonist : "That's fine, there's no health question forms to fill in, so you can have life insurance right away - we can cover you for £10,000,000 at £2.56 a month"
Actor Twat: "That's great! Sign me up now, please"