Red Dumbo sketch

This was rejected from Newsjack episode one.

Hey Chris

Yes, Trumbo isn't well known enough.

You can obviously come up with jokes and write well. This sketch has funny bits but it's a bit wafflely and unfocused. I got lost in it after the Donald Duck bit.

Also, there are too many voices for the cast to do (two guys doing five voices).

Small point, but remember to mention the sound effects by adding "F/X: FOOTSTEPS, WHATEVER" lines.

But I do like your writing. I imagine NJ won't be much of a problem for you.

Thanks a lot Yacob.

I'd say Trumbo is sort of well enough know, not a big story but on the way. It's one of those sketches that if it was really funny, would carry it through.

It's certainly not a bad sketch and you've the format dead right.

But you give the punchline away in the first stanza and kinda just repeat it. It also lacks any really killer lines through out.
Certainly wish upon a star, could have been a joke about wishing on a red star or something?

I would say mixing up Dumbo and Trumbo is a good joke, but you sort of let it slip away from you.

I liked the idea but I think the criticism is fair.

I agree although disagree that Trumbo is well known enough as a film.