British Comedy Guide

Greetings Card Opportunity

I'm sure most will have read this post - but it probably belongs in Wrier's Opps.

https://www.comedy.co.uk/forums/post/1135486/

Thanks for that nudge Lazzard. I missed it before.

Has anybody else had a bash at this?

I got a reply and details of the brief and have sent off a fair few jokes / ideas that have all been quickly and politely declined. I was wondering if anybody had been successful?

Also, is there anywhere else that accepts or seeks ideas for cards? I'm sure that not all of mine are worse than than the ones in print and I'd like to give someone else the chance to reject my efforts.

I sold them two ideas with my first two batches of ideas but my last two batches were unsuccessful. They replied very promptly and the cash was in my account within three days of the ideas being purchased.

Thanks Jeremy and congratulations. I'd convinced myself that nobody had their stuff accepted, so I guess I'd better up my game!

There is an ex member from here that makes good money from writing greeting cards.

Yes, I got one in as well. Very prompt response and payment, great feedback.

The greeting card industry tends to go through phases, I sold loads of stuff to Emotional rescue years ago but then they stopped buying stuff altogether and now they seem to be in the market again.

If you go on the Progressive Greetings website you can seen an on line version of the greeting card industries trade magazine which gives a good idea about which companies are doing lots of humour stuff at the moment.

I submitted quite a few cos I thought it's time for a change as all the cards you try and buy are about getting pissed, getting old and farting.

Got politely declined with some suggestions for improvement, which to me sounded like suggestions to write more getting pissed, getting old and farting jokes.

Dan

My jokes are all about wanking, farting and the Spice Girls. You shouldn't really make jokes about the Spice Girls though.

I think over the years there has been a big shift in the retail card market with more and more cards being sold in supermarkets. The supermarkets are slightly more sensitive about the cards that they stock because they know that lots of kids are likely to see the cards.

I was responsible for the notorious Christmas card a few years ago which said 'Santa likes all kids even ginger ones.' after one mother complained the card was pulled from all Tesco stores.

I think Quitting Hollywood still do the slightly risque cards and some of the on-line companies like Moon Pig are probably more open to ruder stuff because they don't have to appear on supermarket shelves.

Quote: swerytd @ 20th November 2015, 2:40 PM GMT

I submitted quite a few cos I thought it's time for a change as all the cards you try and buy are about getting pissed, getting old and farting.

Got politely declined with some suggestions for improvement, which to me sounded like suggestions to write more getting pissed, getting old and farting jokes.

Dan

Hi Dan,

I managed to get in with one about levitation so its not exclusively the bodily functions/aging/drinking thing - although I may have filled their quota on that topic for the next 5 years. The other stuff does seem to predominate though - that must say something profound about the human condition.

Come on P, admit it: the levitation was farting-based, wasn't it?
:)

Dan

Quote: swerytd @ 24th November 2015, 10:57 AM GMT

Come on P, admit it: the levitation was farting-based, wasn't it?
:)

Dan

If it wasn't then I've got my next submission idea sorted... :)

Quote: Michael Monkhouse @ 21st November 2015, 9:54 AM GMT

My jokes are all about wanking, farting and the Spice Girls. You shouldn't really make jokes about the Spice Girls though.

I completely agree. Though I must admit I did have a posh wank the other day. I was feeling quite energetic. Sporty even! So I had this big old wank about scary spice but all my imagination gave me is the Mel B character from Bo Selector. It might seem a bit babyish but my mind couldn't handle it. I lost my wood, felt ashamed and just did a big old massive fart!

It was spicy!

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