Hi All
(EDIT - It's now 2 cartoons rather than 3. One of them was too naff so I took it down.)
Here are some quick cartoons: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-1WKGEMx3D8&list=PLvK7nASPmttreZ8YdpOE9h97vnOr8dBvL .
Any comments on the writing, look, acting, sound and anything else would be grand.
The link is to a playlist so the three cartoons should play in a row. "Let's Call The Whole Thing Off" is the last one anyone has to look at.
Cheers to anyone who comments!
Yac
Hi Yac,
I find them much too short - can't you come up with a bit more dialogue, and hopefully a funny punchline? The Henry the eight one was particularly annoying.
Thanks Beaky. I wasn't sure about the Henry VIII one - comes across a little smug maybe? Smug's the wrong word, can't think of a better one (just a bad joke maybe 
). Might take that one down. Gave me a chance to play around on photoshop though.
I could make longer stuff with more dialogue but for now I want to figure out some more things animation, voice and music-wise.
Interesting you found them annoying. Was that for any reason in particular or was it a general thing? (I have a fondness for dumb jokes that might be a problem).
Thanks again
Yac
There's a lot to like here. Good voice overs, like your sense of humour but would agree with Beaky, they're a bit too short. It's as if you're doing a newspaper strip or single frame cartoon and too worried about brevity. Stuff before the "argumentative fish" is quiet funny but then it got very hit and miss. I would love to see more. 
Theres no doubt these are getting better,
maybe its just my childish humour but I cracked up at the neither or neither one!
I think these really work when you watch them back to back,
please keep making them they get funnier every time!!!!
I think I said this before, so pardon me if I'm repeating myself 
. I think they;re good, but the YouTube format works against them because we know the micro-length before they start. Part of the joy of short, dumb jokes is that you don't expect the brevity/stupidity, and the slap I the face aids the laughter.
What you have here is like someone sayign "Allow me to surprise you", to a certain extent.
So, I woudl say the animation and voicing is good, and the jokes sometimes make me laugh and sometimes don't, but that's OK, it's how quickies work. I would just like it if they were mised in with pieces of varying lengths, to let the snappy ones win. Perhaps there are other anaimators (here?) who make different things that you could work with the make 6 or 7 minute comps for YouTube...?
I don't know. Like I say, you're good, I like your style, but I feel the animations aren't making the impact on me I'd wish.
Thanks for the comments so far!
OK, next thing I make is going to be longer. It was nice for me to make short pieces so I could practice different drawing styles and voices, but yeah, something longer would be better.
Nick, if you want to see something else of mine I can PM you a link to something I did professionally.
Quote: Yacob Wingnut @ 1st August 2015, 10:54 AM BSTThanks for the comments so far!
OK, next thing I make is going to be longer. It was nice for me to make short pieces so I could practice different drawing styles and voices, but yeah, something longer would be better.
Nick, if you want to see something else of mine I can PM you a link to something I did professionally.
Yes please.