Persistent preachers

Not written a sketch in a while but got this idea the other day, just wanted to see if I could convey my point in writing properly

EXT: (We see two young men wearing suits, trying to preach about God)

Young man 1
Good afternoon sir, do you have a minute to talk about the Church of Jesus Christ?

Young man 2
Are you a spiritual person sir? Do you know where you will be spending eternity?

Young man 1
I will take that silence as you not being sure. please if you have some time then we would love to talk to you about our God and how he can change your life.

Young man 2
Let me just give you these live saving pamphlets...

(The camera zooms out to reveal that the two young men are talking to a horse in a field, trying to put the leaflets into its mouth)

Young man 1
Thank you for your time sir, can you believe that everybody else was too busy for God?

Young man 2
I would really like to read a few passage of the bible that I think you would find very helpful. Just a book or two or three...
Genesis, chapter one...

END

Maybe better if a donkey in a stable. And shorter.

And lose the sirs. That's lying not misdirection.

it's finished when you reveal the horse

Not bad. Nice simple joke. Similar to a lot of the stuff I'm writing at the mo. Have you ever tried filming anything? Should be fairly low budget.

I didn't really find it that funny that they were preaching to a horse. There's not much depth to the gag really, they could pull back and reveal any animal. For this setup you need a HUGE twist.