Super Friends Page 3

Quote: David Bussell @ September 17, 2007, 7:40 PM

When you post on a thread purely to say something is terrible, forgive me, but it does come across as a touch 'snide'.

If you really believe something is 100% irredeemably awful, then there should be a wealth for you to criticise, in which case go nuts. I’m not kidding when I say I welcome people’s opinions, but there’s no use in being contrary just for the sake of it. If something is wholly bad (or even wholly great) then state your case, otherwise what’s the point?

Maybe you just don't like exploding heads?

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Your sketch is not funny because there isn't enough incongruity between the predicted ending and the real one. Terry can make people's heads explode with his mind. The first thing we think is that he will blow up the wrong head. The fact that he blows up sarah's head by accident, in the same way that some people fart when they bend down, further moves away from the unexpected outcome paradigm. It also contradicts the words of Jake, who has talked about Terry's power as if it is controllable. Where there is meaningless there is no humour.

Your critique seems to be flawed.

Terry can make THINGS explode with his mind. He is asked to make a POTATO explode. There is no mention of exploding heads until one explodes.

Jake has talked about the power as controllable and (for me) it is funny when it turns out that it isn't.

My own interpretation of the sketch is that he doesn't mean to explode the girls head, but this happens because he has become stressed by being pressed to use his power, hence why I think the last line is so funny.

I think we should all move on. Godot's opinion and expression of that opinion is as valid as any others. David's work is being critiqued in this thread, nothing else. You all have different opinions which is fine but there is no need to single out a user especially when they have taken time to read your work. Kum by Yar and all that jazz

Obviously there's little doubt as to which of the above opinions I concur with, so I agree, let's move on.

Quote: ajp29 @ September 18, 2007, 2:56 AM

I think we should all move on. Godot's opinion and expression of that opinion is as valid as any others. David's work is being critiqued in this thread, nothing else. You all have different opinions which is fine but there is no need to single out a user especially when they have taken time to read your work. Kum by Yar and all that jazz

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Yes, I agree "...when they have taken time to read your work..." but it's plain to see that Godot didn't read the sketch properly when he finally got around to writing his 'critique'. I was just pointing out the factual flaws in what he wrote which I am sure he was grateful for!

Of course, his statement that the sketch isn't funny was never valid but his OPINION that the sketch isn't funny is clearly completely valid.

Move on? By all means!

I liked it and it did make me laugh. I didn't expect the exploding head.

I would just like to ask David something in reply to the bit,

'I didn't want people to think he made Sarah's head explode on purpose'

David this is the way it came across to me so am I misinterpreting something?? I thought he'd done it because Jake and Sarah were hastling him to show them his trick

Good to see personal attacks on bsg members are cut off. Hakuna Matata. Agree with Dale though - thought he did it because he was being hastled. Evil super hero.

Well, initially I hadn't intended for him to be a villain, just a superpowered guy not in total control of his powers.

I think it's funnier if it's not murder, so if you're reading it as though he's doing it on purpose I guess maybe it needs some work. Ultimately it's down to the delivery of that last line, and it's proving to be a hard one to get across without the use of over-instructional parenthesis.

Quote: Frankie Rage @ September 18, 2007, 1:15 AM

Terry can make THINGS explode with his mind. He is asked to make a POTATO explode. There is no mention of exploding heads until one explodes.

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It doesn't make any difference how I've summarised the sketch. You're mining infertile soil there, Frankie. Context - ie the sketch appearing in a comedy show will make people assume the potato will not be exploded. Sarah's head exploding just isn't incongruous enough to be funny. What else is going to explode if it isn't the potato? It might be Jake's head, but they doesn't make any difference. Similarly, the logic of the situation is undermined by the lack of control Terry shows. If his power is so unstable, surely he has exploded the wrong THING before, in which case why is Jake asking him to show his power?

A more incongruous treatment of an exploding head would be someone switching on a light and a person's head exploding on the other side of the room. But this is on the outer escarpment of funny and it's a long way to go to the summit. Exploding heads just aren't very funny.

Quote: Godot Taxis @ September 19, 2007, 3:42 PM

It doesn't make any difference how I've summarised the sketch. You're mining infertile soil there, Frankie. Context - ie the sketch appearing in a comedy show will make people assume the potato will not be exploded. Sarah's head exploding just isn't incongruous enough to be funny. What else is going to explode if it isn't the potato? It might be Jake's head, but they doesn't make any difference. Similarly, the logic of the situation is undermined by the lack of control Terry shows. If his power is so unstable, surely he has exploded the wrong THING before, in which case why is Jake asking him to show his power?

A more incongruous treatment of an exploding head would be someone switching on a light and a person's head exploding on the other side of the room. But this is on the outer escarpment of funny and it's a long way to go to the summit. Exploding heads just aren't very funny.

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I think you are right that I am mining infertile soil here. I think that my original assessment of your original critique is probably the most valid!

I assess your above piece of writing as pompous twaddle!

Quote: Simon Stratton @ September 18, 2007, 9:07 PM

Good to see personal attacks on bsg members are cut off. Hakuna Matata. Agree with Dale though - thought he did it because he was being hastled. Evil super hero.

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I think he did it more or less accidentally because he was being stressed. I take this from the directions the writer gave, i.e. that they both looked at each other dumbstruck when the head exploded!

Quote: Frankie Rage @ September 19, 2007, 3:50 PM

I think you are right that I am mining infertile soil here. I think that my original assessment of your original critique is probably the most valid!

I assess your above piece of writing as pompous twaddle!

I think he did it because he was being stressed. I take this from the directions the writer gave, i.e. that they both looked dumbstruck when the head exploded!

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I only wrote this because the original writer wasn't happy with my description of the sketch as terrible. He's got the long and the short answer.

Once again, you show that you are quick to insult people, though not with any imagination.

Quote: Godot Taxis @ September 19, 2007, 3:54 PM

I only wrote this because the original writer wasn't happy with my description of the sketch as terrible. He's got the long and the short answer.

Once again, you show that you are quick to insult people, though not with any imagination.

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What you wrote is still pompous twaddle (in my opinion)!

No personal offence intended.

Well, even though I fervently believe Godot simply has a predjudice against exploding head gags, I'm totally won over by his 'escarpment of funny' bit. Now that is funny, whichever way you look at it.

And talking of mining infertile ground, shouldn't we all be getting some writing done about now?

Aye lad, I'm willing to give it a rest. I think Godot and I have crossed swords before, I'm not sure. Also I'd like it to be known that in my opinion he has made many relevant points in many posts across this site. I have no personal issues with anyone on this site. But we can't all agree all of the time.

Best wishes to you both!

A happy ending!!,This is a perfect time for me to open that 1964 chateau velrose.

Hurrah for harmony....