Nj Sketch: Pope Confesses

sent this in 4 minutes late so they must not have read it. Yes that's the reason it didn't get on. Definitely.

NJ SKETCH: POPE CONFESSES

GRAMSAPAL MUSIC.

COMMENTATOR:
This is the moment when the Pontiff will hear confession from the people. No - it looks like he's kneeling down in front of another priest to confess himself. Another amazing first from Pope Francis!

PRIEST: How long has it been since your last - Jesus Christ!

POPE: No, but he sends his regards.

PRIEST: What do you need to confess?

POPE: I can sin, believe me. Eh? What are you doing?

PRIEST: If this doesn't deserve a tweet I don't know what does.

POPE: The confessional is supposed to be a secret place-how many followers do you have?

PRIEST: Hundreds of Thousands.

POPE: Okay - go ahead.

PRIESTAS HE TYPES) Hearing Pope's confession - one of the greatest moments of my-

POPECOUGHS).

PRIEST:The greatest moment of my life. Done. So, what did you do?

POPE:I stole a rosary.

PRIEST:That's not a big deal.

POPEut of the hands of a dead priest.

PRIESTkay?

POPE:Which I still keep close to my person in a pouch to this day.

PRIEST:Kind of freaking me out now but go on.

POPE:That's it.

PRIEST:Aren't you forgetting something?

POPE:You mean, back in Argentina, during the Dictatorship?

PRIEST:No - what happened then?

POPE:Nothing. Nothing at all - what were you talking about?

PRIEST:A little sin called pride? Huh? Eh? Huh?

POPE:I am not guilty of this.

PRIEST:Come on - loving the gays, bashing capitalism, washing all those feet? Were they really that dirty, or did you just want everyone to like you?

POPE:Well... Maybe there was a little pride involved, yes.

PRIEST:Not a problem - just say ten Hail Marys-

POPE:Remember who's in charge here-

PRIEST: Two Hail Marys and you're set.

POPE:Bless you, my son

GRAMSAPAL MUSIC.

END