My mother says, You are what's inside you. Which makes her a complete dick.
Tell us a joke Page 196
Quote: Michael Monkhouse @ 19th May 2017, 11:40 AMMy mother says, You are what's inside you. Which makes her a complete dick.
Classic Monkhouse. 
Would "massive dick" be better?
Thank you!
I had a dream about the Spice Girls playing tennis naked. The score got to deuce, and so did I.
What's the difference between money and sledgehammers? Miley won't put her money where her mouth is.
Women who masturbate should get their finger out.
Series about women wanking during menstruation. Red Hand Gang.
My mother said, Bad news is like a dick. It feels hard at first, but let it sink in a few times and then it's easier to swallow.
Flexible labour: when an acrobat has a baby.
I hate people mixing English and French. It's just self-aggrandisement.
What's the difference between me and Miley? I got a bone to pick.
I didn't want to try bondage, but my hands were tied.
I have to go for a whole day without mentioning any of the Spice Girls... Scary!
What's the difference between a teen in a vegetable patch and a bus in Rome? A teen might cum on thyme.
I jerked off over the X Factor. Slime On Cowell.
My dad keeps going on about his dribbly bottom. He should put a sock in it.
What's the difference between my mother's house and my mother's vagina? You take your shoes off before coming in her house.
I refuse to talk about menstruation. Period.