Cross between a chicken and a cow was not happy. Fowl mooed.
Tell us a joke Page 152
Quote: Michael Monkhouse @ 16th February 2016, 11:00 AM GMTCross between a chicken and a cow was not happy. Fowl mooed.
Gem
Quote: Michael Monkhouse @ 16th February 2016, 11:00 AM GMTCross between a chicken and a cow was not happy. Fowl mooed.
nice one,
What did Yogi Bear say to Cindy Bear when the condom split?
"I think I just made a Boo Boo"
I hate people who still quote Blackadder. The long winter nights must just fly by for them.
I'd just got a nice young lady back to my room the other night, and things were looking promising, when, as per usual, the straggly-haired one out of The Chemical Brothers burst in with his old pet lamb, whose noisy gambolling rather broke the mood. After my potential partner had left in bemused disgust I turned to the straggly-haired one out of The Chemical Brothers and dryly observed, "Back with another one of your cock-blocking bleats?"
What's a Russian leader's favourite fish? Tsardines.
An elephant planned to stand on a balancing sheet of glass. It fell through.
For Freddie Mercury, a 5-year-old's undies are not like the show. The show must go on.
Sorry for repeats, but if it's good nough for the BBC...
I love bestiality, f**king dog's bollocks. I love incest, but Mum's the word. I hate anal, it's f**king shit.
Wouldn't
the cat's arsehole work as a better punch?
My cat just came home after a night on the tiles.
She's been to her Scrabble club.
Ouch!
In honour of the Spice Girls, I called my first kid Melanie Geri Melanie Emma Victoria. He'll never forgive me.
Quote: Michael Monkhouse @ 20th February 2016, 11:00 AM GMTOuch!
In honour of the Spice Girls, I called my first kid Melanie Geri Melanie Emma Victoria. He'll never forgive me.
Johnny Cash (change from a condom machine) beat you to it. 
What did Michal Jackson do to his dick during Grange Hill? Beat it, just beat it.
What do you get if you cross Bob Monkhouse with Michael Jackson?
A funny f**ker.
Or Michael Monkhouse - another funny f**ker
What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? A freak.
Quote: Michael Monkhouse @ 20th February 2016, 11:51 AM GMTWhat do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? A freak.
I prefer the woolly jumper. Genetic Engineering - making your playground jokes a reality.