Lovely Script Edit & Development Service Page 4

Quote: Steve Sunshine @ 11th December 2013, 3:04 PM GMT

That's the guy I want editing my scripts!

You've got the job!

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You are the worst.

Sorry!

Right No more off topic shenanigans or plugging your own stuff on Matts Thread

#TeamStott

Quote: Steve Sunshine @ 11th December 2013, 3:24 PM GMT

Sorry!

Right No more off topic shenanigans or plugging your own stuff on Matts Thread

#TeamStott

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Haha, that was like THE worst ad for the thread

Sorry, Matt.

Dan

Giving this a bump because I'm a rebel. I will help you get your funny scripts in shape, I will help make the next draft better.

Get in touch, and let others know.

Thanks.

Yeah.

HEY.

Get your scripts in to me now, and I'll have your helpful notes back to you by new year (unless fifty of you get in touch, I'm not Superman. I know that's hard to believe, but I'm not).

Get to it!

EXT -- Roof of 51 Station Row -- Night

It is a dark and stormy night. Snow swirls around the chimney pots.
FATHER XMAS (A white bearded man in a red cloak) is gripping
a chimney to avoid being blown away.

FATHER XMAS
F**K... A blackbird has built a smelly nest on this chimney..

INT -- Alice's Bedroom in 51 Station Row.. -- NIGHT

That's as far as I've go so far, please can you help me with the rest

Quote: billwill @ 19th December 2013, 1:08 PM GMT

That's as far as I've go so far, please can you help me with the rest

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I'll be honest, the whole set up for this feels a little unbelievable, and I'm left wondering 'how did this old man get on the roof?' and 'What exactly is he going to do with Alice in her bedroom?'. I'd really need to see a lot more of this as it leaves me with more questions than answers I'm afraid.

Quote: Matthew Stott @ 19th December 2013, 1:29 PM GMT

I'll be honest, the whole set up for this feels a little unbelievable, and I'm left wondering 'how did this old man get on the roof?'

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It's just a bad critique Bill, please don't kill yourself.

Quote: Gerry McDonnell @ 19th December 2013, 1:43 PM GMT

It's just a bad critique Bill, please don't kill yourself.

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Not until you've tranferred the crit money into my account, anyway.

I'm writing a sitcom about 2 sitcom critiquers, both of whom are desperately looking for clients on an obscure comedy site.

I was thinking of "who gives a crit?"

It would be like Never the Twain, but with more masturbation.

Quote: sootyj @ 19th December 2013, 1:58 PM GMT

I'm writing a sitcom about 2 sitcom critiquers, both of whom are desperately looking for clients on an obscure comedy site.

I was thinking of "who gives a crit?"

It would be like Never the Twain, but with more masturbation.

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Send it to me, but I'll charge you triple my going rate.

Will your crit be 3 times as good?

Quote: sootyj @ 19th December 2013, 4:46 PM GMT

Will your crit be 3 times as good?

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How can you improve on perfection?

I'd have gone with

It'll need to be you illiterate gobshite