NJ: Borsch Bear Necessities

INTROThis week a couple in Russia had to be saved from hungry bears after their beetroot soup. But was this really just revenge for Goldilocks?

GRAMS: Hanna Barbera cartoon style

BOO BOOYogi I'm hungry. Can't we go home and eat?

YOGINo, Boo Boo. Jellystone's closed to save money. That's why there's been no pic-a-nic baskets all week.

BOO BOOSo we're foraging because of the shutdown?

YOGIYou got it Boob and (sniff sniff) I think that's beet-a-root soup I can smell now.

FX: Window breaking

YOGICome on, Boo Boo, we can get the soup and away before anyone notices.

BOO BOOMr Ranger's not going to like us breaking in, Yogi.

YOGIMr Ranger's on a furlough, Boob - and I don't mean like the hair on my feet.

BOO BOONo Yogi - you mean unpaid leave.

YOGIThat's pretty clever of you Boo Boo.

BOO BOOI've been learning from you, Yogi.

YOGIWell I am smarter than the average bear

BOO BOOI've never asked, Yogi: is that average the mean, median or mode?

YOGII've no idea what you're on about Boo Boo. The average bear isn't that smart. Now let's grab this love-er-ly beet-a-root soup and go before anyone knows we're here.

FX: Two Gunshots

BOO BOOOh no, Yogi - it's Comrade Ranger Smithski.

YOGIRunski! I'm not going to a gulag, Boo Boo. I couldn't bear it.

FX: Hanna Barbera tinkling-running sound

END

It's good -- and I like the mean/median/mode gag *very* much -- but it's not blowaway fantastic (which is what they are looking for, I suspect). Maybe spreading the action across the sketch (ie have them breaking into this place and slurping the soup whilst they're discussing the rest) would even out the action a bit more.

Maybe Comrade Ranger Smithski actually speaking, catching them and *him* telling them they're going to the Gulag (or even Siberia!) would be better (as it gives you a comedy Russian voice, which everyone loves! hahaha!)

Dan

The average bear joke is good, but conflating the closure of Yellowstone Park with a story about a bear attack in Russia does not really work.

Quote: Tursiops @ October 11 2013, 3:40 PM BST

The average bear joke is good, but conflating the closure of Yellowstone Park with a story about a bear attack in Russia does not really work.

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Agreed, especially when you've further confused things by throwing Goldilocks into the mix.