Ok Here goes, The ones I didn't like I've commented on, the ones I liked I've said, and the ones that gave me ideas I've added my version of underneath, Hope you don't mind my comments, lets hope you like some of the the ideas!
1. My wife hit me with a cordless drill last week, Bosch!
Very Good,
You could add a few extras if you like, off the top of my head!
1. part,b,) She did try to throw it at me, but luckily it was chuckless!
I said what was that for, she said, Screw you!
you can't reason with her when she's got the bit between her teeth,
2. I wanted to surprise my nan for her 80th birthday, I popped over with a KFC Family Feast but she kicked the bucket.
My Nan want's KFC for her 80th Birthday, Lets hope she doesn't kick the bucket!
3. Bumped into an old friend on the tube last week and he farted on my leg. Well that was a blast from the past.
This is two jokes, the start is one and the end is another as one joke they don't work so how about!
I Bumped into an old friend last week and he farted on my leg, His memory still lingers.
A friend who I hadn't seen for 20 years called to see me yesterday to tell me he was now a historian specialising in Bomb attcks from world war 11, It was a real BLAST FROM THE PAST!
4. Should we be getting involved with President Assad's bombs - chemical weapons are Syrias business
Didn't like it, topical jokes get old very quickly!
5. I'm quite handy around the house, last night I unblocked the food disposal in under 30 seconds. Piece of cake.
Good but did make me laugh!
6. Messing up your brothers toy cars when he has aspergers syndrome is out of order.
it doesn't really work,
how about,
My dyslexic brother texted me NABG yesterday!
I thought that's bang out of order!
