Teacher:
Hello class I am Mrs Thomas and I am your Hooverspik teacher for the next 3 years .Does anyone know what Hooverspik is ?... What no one?
Pupil:
Its when vacuum cleaners talk to each other.
Teacher:
That's right, Hooverspik started on the 31st January 2313 when a group of sentient industrial hoovers were left together in a cupboard overnight. As the hoovers moved from workplace to workplace, the language spread with them. It is now spoken by over 750 million sentient hoovers throughout the galaxy.
We will start with three basic sounds from which you can form lots of words.
Repeat Nyo Gaa ZZZ
Class:
Nyo Gaa ZZZ
Teacher:
Good but you need to sound more like a vacuum cleaner. Try these words. Nyo means SUCK . Nyo Nyo means CLEAN Gaa means FIBRE Gaa Gaa means CARPET
....
3 years later
....
Teacher:
Alice Translate into bagless dialect. My circular headed nozzle with a diameter of 3cm nearly sucked up the oversized crisp.
Alice:
Nyo GGaZAANyiNyoGaGGadaDaNyoGaGGaZZZNyoo
Teacher:
Excellent. Alice and good luck in your new cleaning job at the garden centre. I knew from the start you were the one most likely to succeed.
