Puntasia

A short selection of one liners, for your delectation and comment if you please.

Translated from the original Russian, Isinbayeva means "to backpedal furiously".

New edition of the Oxford English Dictionary in the post to F R David. See, words do come easy sometimes.

Eric Pickles wants us all to put our wheelie bins away out of sight. Sometimes, willpower just isn't enough, is it Eric?

You know you're posh when you've had sex in the same room as a harp. The nearest I ever got was a quick fumble in the same aisle as the Harpic.

Plans for a Northern Ireland peace centre at The Maze have taken a turn to the left then walked straight into a dead end.

Didn't get the A Level results you wanted? Congratulations. You're now £27,000 better off than those who did.

Andy

The Eric pickles one and the A level ones were my favourites.

I like the Pickles one too, also the harp one, but without the second bit about Harpic. The Maze is good, too.

They're not puns really?

They're ok, well structured got a punchline etc.

But they all feel abit I dunno lazy, like you've got a fairly obvious idea and not done much with it.

I suppose it's different reading them to hearing them delivered.

While a couple of them are a bit obvious what the punchline is going to be (The Maze one as an example), delivered at a decent pace there may not be the time for the audience to work out what's coming.

The Harpic one probably needs a pause after the harp. Use that almost as a setup for the second bit maybe.

You're judged in the format you work in.

A lot of word play jokes only work on the page and not verbally.

The reverse is true of course, some jokes only work verbally.

These are ok, they just didn't jump off the page.

I dunno maybe work on harp and pick.

"The closes I got to picking my harp, was cleaning the toilet"