AGNES AND ETHEL ARE SITTING ON CHAIRS
AGNES
Eee it's no fun getting old is it.
ETHEL
Too right, it's awful I wish my Harold was still around he did have had something to say about it. Something quite rude I suspect.
AGNES
He is still around, he's in the airing cupboard.
ETHEL
You mean the rob dogs at the council still haven't buried him? I wondered what the smell was?
AGNES
I thought that was me, my carer last changed my colostomy bag 2 years ago.
ETHEL
It's rotten getting old. Still I read in the Daily Mail....
AGNES
What that voting labor gives you cancer and gay marriage is what Hitler wanted?
ETHEL
No you daft bat, Norman Lamb that nice MP thinks that neighbourhood watch should start taking care of the elderly.
FX DOOR BELL RINGS
AGNES GETS UPTO ANSWER THE DOOR
ETHEL
He says it'll also save on pensions.
AGNES
How?
AGNES OPENS THE DOOR AND GEORGE ZIMMER MAN WALKS IN
GEORGE
Hi I'm your new neighbour hood watch man George Zimmer man
GEORGE SHOOTS AGNES AND ETHEL