We see 'Confident Colin' the medieval con man walking through the woods when Robin & his Merry Men jump out of the bushes
ROBIN
Ok give me your valuables
COLIN
I'm skint mate I was going to ask you for money
ROBIN
But we're robbers?
COLIN
Yeah, but I heard in the village that you've been giving away half of everything that you rob to the poor?
ROBIN
That's right I do, in fact so do we all.
Robin sweeps his arm and all the Merry Men nod in agreement
LITTLE JOHN
We're like that
COLIN
Look lads rather than ruining everyone's day why don't you give me everything that you've robbed today, then you can rob it back off me and then give that to the villagers but leave me with half that way no one's offended no one's really been robbed and you keep your good name as the lads who run Sherwood!
ROBIN
We've only stole a live piglet so far, so how can we give you half?
COLIN
It's easy just give me the pig and then rob it back off me and we can sort it out then.
They give 'Confident Colin' the pig and then stand around him in mock anger with their daggers drawn
ROBIN
Right you rascal give us that pig
COLIN
(Incensed)
It's all I've got lads, you know that!, I told you I was skint, come on don't ruin your good names by robbing a hungry mans last pig for f**k sake! You lads are supposed to be legends round here.
ROBIN
But it was our pig already, so we're not really robbing you are we
COLIN
Thank f**k for that lads
'Confident Colin walks off with the piglet under one arm as he waves goodbye with the other.
ROBIN
What the f**k happened there?
LITTLE JOHN
I've no idea, my he's a smart bugger we should have him in our gang.
ROBIN
What for?
LITTLE JOHN
Well he'd be more handy than that f**king Lute player you took on!
