British Comedy Guide

Sergio Garcia (Newsrevue reject)

SERGIO GARCIA IS UP IN FRONT OF A JUDGE.

JUDGE:
Mr Garcia, plotting to serve a racially insensitive meal is a very serious offence.

SERGIO:
Look, I know my quip has teed off a lot of people, PUTT there are mitigating circumstances!

JUDGE:
Such as?

SERGIO:
Well, I was very underpar that day!

JUDGE:
That's not what a little birdie told me.

SERGIO:
Look, I am not a racist. Some of my...

JUDGE:
Best friends are black?

SERGIO:
They are! And let me tell you; they all loooove fried chicken!

JUDGE:
Mr Garcia, do you WANT to dig a deeper hole for yourself?

SERGIO:
Okay, look, tell me this... if it's wrong to give KFC to a black person, then what CAN you serve them?

JUDGE:
Isn't it obvious?

BEAT

SERGIO:
(CLICKS FINGER) Watermelon!

END

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